This page sponsored by Mr. S Leather, San Francisco    [other banners]

	TSR : Web boards : M/s D/s O&P : "Who decides collaring?" 1 2 3 Who decides collaring? (27) This post is on the M/s D/s O&P web board. 4 Feb 12, 9:36 AM Hawklord UK, 6 yrs Devanant wrote: Who decides collaring? I want to collar my submissive. Submissive or slave? There is a big difference. If you own her then it's up to you. Devanant wrote: Diving in a bit further, what if a girl doesnt want to willingly submit? I always feel like I force her against her will If you own her then force her against her will. It's your will that counts not hers. If this is 24/7 slavery then put on your collar if you want to, and anything else you want to do with your property. Are you Master or mouse? Sic volo. sic jubeo. stat pro ratione voluntas 4 Feb 12, 9:56 AM Prolixitys_Saphira US, 16 mths Hawklord wrote: Devanant wrote: Who decides collaring? I want to collar my submissive. Submissive or slave? There is a big difference. If you own her then it's up to you. Devanant wrote: Diving in a bit further, what if a girl doesnt want to willingly submit? I always feel like I force her against her will If you own her then force her against her will. It's your will that counts not hers. If this is 24/7 slavery then put on your collar if you want to, and anything else you want to do with your property. Are you Master or mouse? I concur, but not particularly in this situation because Devanant is stating she's having some trouble with the whole lifestyle idea and isn't as deep in it as he is. I think others are right and things need to be talked out between them before he slaps a collar on her. Owned, loved and protected by Prolixity. 5 Feb 12, 9:45 PM MtrPatrick US, 12 mths Y! In my opinion, things are the reverse of the vanilla world, the slave asks or "begs" for the collar and the Master says yea or nay. the exact opposite of the traditional male -female marriage. But then again my opinion is only absolute to me and mine. 6 Feb 12, 12:50 AM Mistress_Rebekah CA, 10 mths Y! Honestly, in a situation like this, I don't believe it matters who "asks" whom first... the only important factor is that both accept/agree/consent to the relationship and that the relationship has been discussed and is understood for what it is by both parties involved. Just because someone is naturally dominant does not mean they will make a good Master/Mistress or qualify them to own a slave. Being bossy, domineering, controlling and wanting things your own way all the time isn't the only aspect of this lifestyle... you also need to take into consideration the mental/emotional/physical health of your sub/slave. You need to guide/teach your sub/slave. You, and you alone, are responsible for your sub/slave. You think of your sub/slave as well as yourself... not only of yourself. Also, just because someone is naturally "submissive" (and there are so many other words to put in here that accurately describe the submissive personality), does not mean they are meant to be a sub/slave to and serve someone. You both need to discuss your relationship. What it means to each of you... and where you see it going in the next few weeks/months/years. Your girlfriend is unwilling to allow you your way for a reason... you need to find out what that reason is... or this relationship (at least the way you envision it) probably will not work in the long term. Until she is your agreeable and collared slave, she is fairly free to be as and do what she likes. You have no justification for getting "angry" with her, in my opinion, when she does not obey your word as law... until she has consented to be your slave. Perhaps she has concerns about what this will mean... perhaps it is more of a game or a bit of kink to her but not a real lifestyle choice. I'm only guessing from some of the things you have stated. But, again, I can't stress communication with one another enough. Best of luck with whatever happens... M. Rebekah 6 Feb 12, 11:29 PM mastersgirl3 US, 5 mths naughtyslave wrote: It is the Doms choice when to collar or not..but..much like the wedding ring,she has the choice to accept it or not.With the collar comes heavy commitment and she might not be ready to take that step. this of course is only the opinion of a slave and might not be shared by many or any..just an opinion i agree! i am collard and i accepted it and was excited that mine has a heart shape lock that Master has the key to. 8 Feb 12, 6:56 AM Be_loved US(AR), 23 mths Devanant wrote: Who decides collaring? Im new to this and looking for advice from both doms and subs. I want to collar my submissive. She isnt opposed, but not all that willing either. Whos decision is this? As the dominant one, I feel it is my desicion alone when to collar her, but I would really like some others opinions on this topic. Also would like to know how one knows when the time is right to implement a collar in the relationship. Thanks to all who reply. In my case, it was a decision than we both took. I understand that in many cases, the dominant is the one deciding, but my Master wanted me to be a participant in this decision. As for when is the right time to collar, the master will undoubtedly decide. Mine collared me from the beginning, but I've known other masters who prefer their slaves earn the 'right' to wear one. I'm sure that if you bring this up to your master, that he'll tell you what he thinks and then you he shall proceed. The collar is fine and I absolutely cherish mine, but some doms don't feel it's necessary. This is between you and your master. Much luck! Be_loved, Master HD Dominus slave "Everything that Is and Was will cease to Be."- Old Irish Proverb 8 Feb 12, 7:33 AM 766-003-205 US(CA), 11 mths Y! There certainly are many ways to go about it. In my case, i asked Him and He agreed, but NOW He wants to have a collaring anniversary and for me to get another stealth collar that is not removable except by pliers (available by EMS) i look forward to it. i love that HE now wants to assert that. 8 Feb 12, 10:54 AM Hawklord UK, 6 yrs 766-003-205 wrote: not removable except by pliers (available by EMS) I understand how this feels. There is an awesome collar from Axmar that has an internal pin. Once in place the pin is inaccessible. The collar can only be removed with an angle grinder and no man will take one of those near a girl's neck. It's on forever. Worth bearing in mind that my no.2 even had to remove her bracelet when she flew last. Sic volo. sic jubeo. stat pro ratione voluntas 29 Apr 12, 5:22 AM Miss_Astere US, 2 yrs For me it's as simple as this: if you enjoy forcing your will on her despite her not so great enthusiasm, go ahead. If you find it more important to see true desire well, you have a little more work to do. Keep in mind though that a collar may not be your thing. Just because it is a well established practice in the lifestyle if it carries no meaning for either of you why adopt. 29 Apr 12, 5:24 AM Miss_Astere US, 2 yrs But yes, you decide it, period. Next page