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TSR : Web boards : M/s D/s O&P : "I fail.... Curse my shy awkwardness"

I fail.... Curse my shy awkwardness (8)

This post is on the M/s D/s O&P web board.

Fri 20 Jan 12, 1:41 AM
ZombiePuppet
US(OH), 14 mths
Y!*
So I got asked out at the japanese grocery store here. The guy works there and I see him fairly often because I still cook and care for my ex Master who is Japanese. Anyways I was there shopping for dinner ingredients. He came up asked me on a date and I stared at him made an odd noise and ran away . any tips for not being so shy all the time? I used to cling to ex master constantly and I dont have that anymore at least not to the same degree. Im embarassed but yeah it was pretty hilarious anyways
20 Jan 12, 2:16 AM
mindControl_Master
US(NY), 6 mths
Y!*
Were you bothered by your inability to say no thank you, or your inability to say ok, I'd love to?

In the Shadows of the Darkest Places in your Mind

20 Jan 12, 3:23 AM
ZombiePuppet
US(OH), 14 mths
Y!*
mindControl_Master wrote:
Were you bothered by your inability to say no thank you, or your inability to say ok, I'd love to?

My inability to say anything at all

20 Jan 12, 4:07 AM
slave_torianna
US(GA), 15 mths

A deep breath before I even let 1 word out...it.helps me center and gives me a second to get a grip on the situation.

Goodluck!

slave torianna

i dont walk in front or beside Daddy, i walk a step behind in my place, but close enough to grab His shirt tail if i ever get scared.
i'm thankful to my Master that never leaves me behind. Thank you for loving someone like me Daddy.

20 Jan 12, 6:45 AM
766-003-205
US(CA), 11 mths
Y!*
Try rehearsing. Rehearse until you don't feel silly, until you can walk up closer and silently rehearse.

Tell yourself you must not move until you answer as you rehearsed.

Breathe deep and slow- s stated above. Too deep and fast will hyperventilate you and make you confuse the symptoms with panic and you will scare yourself. Practicing relaxation techniques is better done before you need them. So learn to defuse yourself.

20 Jan 12, 8:00 AM
hastyent
5 mths
You might want to check out the book "The Highly sensitive person."

The basic idea is that some people process their sensory inputs more than others, and these people can become overstimulated and overwhelmed more easily than most.

It sounds to me like you were overwhelmed not shy.

The good news is that increased familiarity with situatuons makes them less likely to be overwhelming.

I have not yet figured out how to catch myself when everything is overwhelming and employ relation techniqes but I hear those work as well.

20 Jan 12, 1:56 PM
SL_precious
CA, 3 yrs

Believe it or not I used to be incredibly shy. I missed out on a lot of things when I was younger because I was too afraid to speak with people. I had the hardest time accepting a compliment without getting all red in the face and going silent. I read somewhere that by reacting that way it makes the person giving the compliment (or in your case, asking you out) feel badly. The best thing to do is just smile and say thank you...or no thank you, So that's what I started to do, it was a better experience for me and I think probably for the other person as well.

As hard as it sounds, the only way to get over it is to push through it. You need to force yourself to face those situations. Each time you do you will feel stronger and more confident and before you know it you will be feeling less anxious about it. People are just people, no different than you. what's the worst that can happen? You meet a lovely new person or a jerk, the thing is you just won't know if you don't risk it.

And like torianna and 205 said...breathe! Best of luck :-)

precious

"Amazing what happens when we let go, surrender all and embrace the painful changes that are necessary to bring wholeness, and a brighter tomorrow." Suzanne Sondberg

22 Jan 12, 3:24 PM
ZombiePuppet
US(OH), 14 mths
Y!*
hastyent wrote:
You might want to check out the book "The Highly sensitive person."

The basic idea is that some people process their sensory inputs more than others, and these people can become overstimulated and overwhelmed more easily than most.

It sounds to me like you were overwhelmed not shy.

The good news is that increased familiarity with situatuons makes them less likely to be overwhelming.

I have not yet figured out how to catch myself when everything is overwhelming and employ relation techniqes but I hear those work as well.

I get asked out fairly often but ussually Ihave a friend or someone to speak on my behalf. I feel like the indian guy from the big bang theory. Im going back to the j store today so we will see what happens. Maybe I can pull myself together to actually talk to him.

22 Jan 12, 3:26 PM
ZombiePuppet
US(OH), 14 mths
Y!*
SL_precious wrote:
Believe it or not I used to be incredibly shy. I missed out on a lot of things when I was younger because I was too afraid to speak with people. I had the hardest time accepting a compliment without getting all red in the face and going silent. I read somewhere that by reacting that way it makes the person giving the compliment (or in your case, asking you out) feel badly. The best thing to do is just smile and say thank you...or no thank you, So that's what I started to do, it was a better experience for me and I think probably for the other person as well.

As hard as it sounds, the only way to get over it is to push through it. You need to force yourself to face those situations. Each time you do you will feel stronger and more confident and before you know it you will be feeling less anxious about it. People are just people, no different than you. what's the worst that can happen? You meet a lovely new person or a jerk, the thing is you just won't know if you don't risk it.

And like torianna and 205 said...breathe! Best of luck :-)

precious

Thank you! Im going to try to at least talk to him if he approaches me again.

 

 
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