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	TSR : Web boards : M/s D/s O&P : "Life without a collar" 1 2 Life without a collar (17) This post is on the M/s D/s O&P web board. 9 Jan 12, 11:32 PM Prolixitys_Saphira US, 16 mths It says in your profile you're being considered. There's a focus for you--learning what your potential master wants out of a slave and working on perfecting those behaviors in yourself so you can show you're serious about becoming his. Good luck finding your grounding again and I hope everything works out for you! Owned, loved and protected by Prolixity. 10 Jan 12, 9:06 PM sublj1 UK, 4 yrs i can totally understand how you are feeling, i would be totally lost without my MASTER, although at times i to am very difficult to handle and my MASTER has voiced his concerns that it will ruin our relationship as MASTER/slave. a MASTER can tolerate only so much and you are very brave to go it alone and work through your issues. i pray that my MASTER will help me through my issues, as he is strong and understands. 10 Jan 12, 9:56 PM Hawklord UK, 6 yrs I kind of thought this was coming from your earlier posts. I hope you find a new Master soon, but don't rush into it. As for the issues I firmly believe the issues are all the Master's. Unless it's a health problem it's up to the Master to change you, not chuck you out. slave_needs_trained wrote: Life without a collar So after four years of being owned my owner has decided he no longer wants me as a slave. I completely understand why he does not wish to be my master anymore. I was simply to difficult for him. I have never been uncollared not since my very first boyfriend. I have only had two owners but it was a quick easy transition from owner one to owner two. I feel empty and worthless when I am not a slave. I just dont know what to do with myself. I am working on the issues that caused me to lose him. I just feel lost and alone so I just wanted to vent. Thank you Sic volo. sic jubeo. stat pro ratione voluntas 12 Jan 12, 7:47 PM sub_brittnay 4 mths I am going through the same thing you are now. My ex Dominant told me to leave just before Christmas, we had been together for almost 5 years. He said that it wasn't me but him. But, that didn't make it any easier for me. I too have this huge void inside me that I need to fill. I wasn't that submissive when we got together but it is a role that I have learned to love and cherish. Having to be on my own and making my own decisions is new to me and I don't like it at all. But, I try to take it one day at a time hoping that another will come into my life sooner that later. 12 Jan 12, 11:26 PM ZombiePuppet US(OH), 14 mths Y! sub_brittnay wrote: I am going through the same thing you are now. My ex Dominant told me to leave just before Christmas, we had been together for almost 5 years. He said that it wasn't me but him. But, that didn't make it any easier for me. I too have this huge void inside me that I need to fill. I wasn't that submissive when we got together but it is a role that I have learned to love and cherish. Having to be on my own and making my own decisions is new to me and I don't like it at all. But, I try to take it one day at a time hoping that another will come into my life sooner that later. We. Still live together. It makes it so much worse. He is so short with me lately. I got cussed out for asking how dinner was. I swear to gd thats all i said. I wish he could be happy. 12 Jan 12, 11:26 PM ZombiePuppet US(OH), 14 mths Y! sub_brittnay wrote: I am going through the same thing you are now. My ex Dominant told me to leave just before Christmas, we had been together for almost 5 years. He said that it wasn't me but him. But, that didn't make it any easier for me. I too have this huge void inside me that I need to fill. I wasn't that submissive when we got together but it is a role that I have learned to love and cherish. Having to be on my own and making my own decisions is new to me and I don't like it at all. But, I try to take it one day at a time hoping that another will come into my life sooner that later. Ps im really sorry you are going through this! 16 Jan 12, 2:41 PM BillyT JP, 4 mths This seems like an obvious thing to say, and I'm sure you've thought it yourself, but sometimes it helps to see it written down.  You want to make him happy, but to do that it seems you can no longer be his. That's a terribly painful place to be. I understand that all too well. But trying to force a relationship to work once it has broken down will cause you far more anguish further down the road. That's a lesson I learned the hard way - so I guess this is a case of "do as I say, not as I do" <wry grin>.  It also sounds like he's beginning to take out his frustrations on you, which is entirely unfair. I agree whole heartedly with Hawklord's comment above - these issues are his. Your feelings for him are quite clear, and that he was unable (unwilling, perhaps) to bring you to a point where he could be happy with you is a failing on his part, and something he may well be struggling to come to terms with. Again though, that doesn't give him the right to take it out on you. Living together obviously amplifies these negative emotions - you're a permanent reminder to each other of happier times.  That said, on a purely logistical note, not sure if you're still in Japan but moving here is a pigging nightmare for us gaijin, so I wouldn't recommend putting that sort of stress on yourself on top of what you're already going through.  Hmmm. That seems like a lot of unhelpful talk from me doesn't it? I probably shouldn't be allowed on the Internet. For what it's worth, akemashite omedettou! and I hope the rest of the year of the dragon improves immeasurably for you.   Life ain't holding the good cards, it's playing a bad hand well.