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	TSR : Web boards : M/s D/s O&P : "Collaring Ceremony?" 1 2 Collaring Ceremony? (15) This post is on the M/s D/s O&P web board. Sun 27 Nov 11, 4:26 AM aella_kitten US(OH), 17 mths Master collared me technically 2 years ago around the time of O/our wedding....however...there was never a collaring ceremony. Now and days, we regret this and have given thought to having one. Mostly because He wishes for U/us to share to whole experience together and not just bits and parts. What are your thoughts on this? A bad Owner orders submission. A good Owner requests submission. A true Owner inspires submission. 27 Nov 11, 11:42 AM Ms_Valentine UK, 4 yrs aella_kitten wrote: Collaring Ceremony? Master collared me technically 2 years ago around the time of O/our wedding....however...there was never a collaring ceremony. Now and days, we regret this and have given thought to having one. Mostly because He wishes for U/us to share to whole experience together and not just bits and parts. What are your thoughts on this? I am not sure I understand what you feel you have missed out on? You are married so you are legally bonded together in a partnership. A collaring ceremony is I suppose a bdsm version of the same thing. You agree to submit or be his slave, he agrees to dominate or be your Master. It is usually a public thing so will be carried out in front of scene friends. I think the only value they have is to yourselves. If you want or feel you need one. I am sure no one actually 'needs' one as such so it is just down to your individual wishes. I think maybe a good way to assess the situation is to list the reasons why or not to have a collaring ceremony. Some might feel their bdsm union is not complete in the eyes of others unless a ceremony is held. That will depend upon your local scene. If it is not to be a public thing, then it will be just about what you see it giving to you as a couple. I have thought about this and I have decided that paul and I are in a very happy and fulfilled FLR and even though I placed his lifelong chain around his neck five years ago, there was no ceremony. I am more inclined to celebrate it publicly at maybe ten years when I know the substance of what we are celebrating. To me any celebration would be to show the length our relationships can endure, not just to celebrate the collaring itself, which is just the start of the journey. I certainly feel no need for a collaring ceremony, as I am totally fulfilled with what our relationship gives us as it stands. It will not be improved or made any more likely to last because of any ceremony. So, unless, it will actually add value to what you have, it boils down to whether you want a ceremony or not. 27 Nov 11, 12:17 PM slave_emma US(OK), 6 yrs Y! I am guessing you want to have a collaring ceremony in front of your other lifestyle friends, which is something you didn't do in the past. I can understand that. When I was collared it was in private, however, when my Master and I got married we eloped. I always wanted to have an actual wedding so a few years later we had a renewal of vows where we actually did the whole wedding thing. It was worth it for the memories for us. Best wishes, slave emma Master Howard's little girl 27 Nov 11, 3:16 PM SirStrict43 UK, 6 yrs One wonders if emotionally you seek now an affirmation or deepening of the promises you made at the Collaring? SS 27 Nov 11, 6:13 PM Ms_Valentine UK, 4 yrs SirStrict43 wrote: One wonders if emotionally you seek now an affirmation or deepening of the promises you made at the Collaring? SS This leads me to wonder what kinds of promises are made at a collaring? I always assumed that to be 'collared' meant a lifetime commitment to submit to someone or if the flavour of the relationship is M/s, to be a slave forever. So, I guess I thought that the promises made at a collaring were pretty much as deep as they could be. Like everything else in bdsm, it seems to me that we may have different views as to what a collaring means regardless of whether it is accompanied by any kind of ceremony. I should say I have only ever collared one person and that was done knowing he was the the man for me. It meant far more to me than my vanilla marriage vows and ceremonies meant as it was a unique and personal thing which was only for us. 27 Nov 11, 6:20 PM aella_kitten US(OH), 17 mths Thank Y/you all for you comments. For me it feels more like a mix of what both SirStrict43 and slave_emma said. Sorry if the post was not more specific, had a hard time putting it into words. Master and I are talking about holding it in front of people of the community that are closest to us. The line that popped out the most to me was "affirmation or deepening of the promises you made at the Collaring" and in a way...yes. Master collared me around the wedding when Master was still learning. Now and days He finds He has a deeper understanding of the relationship W/we hold and also of the lifestyle. Back in the day He thought the wedding would be enough. Now He looks at the ceremonies differently. That and He wishes for me to hold the memories of the ceremony. He had a friend that never had a wedding and the friend now regrets never doing it and sharing those memories with their spouse. Master does not wish the same for me in O/our life. If I have made any sense at all here. Sorry for any confusion. A bad Owner orders submission. A good Owner requests submission. A true Owner inspires submission. 28 Nov 11, 8:51 PM Ticklefish 6 mths I think a collaring ceremony could be quite nice. Somewhat like renewing your vows. None there would have doubted the strength of your relationship but it's always nice to show it off. I dread to think what the cake would look like though. Ticklefish - Master Without A Good Signature 28 Nov 11, 9:14 PM NobodyKP GR, 3 yrs aella_kitten wrote: ... we regret this and have given thought to having one... If both of you feel you want it then do it and dont pay attention to what people say... After all it is something that is impportant to you for reasons you know! Years from now regard less of how your relation is going to develop it is better to have done it then regreting not to. M Kostas Its impossible for someone to learn what he thinks he already knows... 28 Nov 11, 9:34 PM mindControl_Master US(NY), 6 mths Y! Yes, a collaring ceremony would be that extra push over the cliff. Gather a few close friends in the lifestyle and performing an intimate ceremony at home. In the Shadows of the Darkest Places in your Mind 29 Nov 11, 7:41 PM 771-496-429 UK, 21 mths I like costa coffee shops in UK, Feel so much sharper after a good simmer of dark goopey goo stuff into happer times, I get really sad when coffee does not make me always automatically better, In a strange world, a lip dispensor would make the collar for you feel more fiutting than..... 29 Nov 11, 10:41 PM NobodyKP GR, 3 yrs 771-496-429 wrote: I like costa coffee shops in UK, Feel so much sharper after a good simmer of dark goopey goo stuff into happer times, I get really sad when coffee does not make me always automatically better, In a strange world, a lip dispensor would make the collar for you feel more fiutting than..... I know my english is not perfect (far from it) but I did not understand what exactly it is that you say... Is my english really that bad? Its impossible for someone to learn what he thinks he already knows... Next page