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	TSR : Web boards : M/s D/s O&P : "Can you Train a Master? " 1 2 3 Can you Train a Master? (28) This post is on the M/s D/s O&P web board. Fri 25 Feb 11, 8:06 AM Nyx_Archer US(OH), 15 mths I got engaged a few months ago, to a man I've loved for years. I'm young yet, only 23, so maybe we fell in love too young, maybe not... He's been the first and only many in my life so far... and things are starting to pull apart for me. I know what I need, what I want. I need a Master- maybe only in the bedroom, but I need it. Yet... the man I love isn't a Master. I have tried so hard to lead him there. I've held so much of myself back, what I want and what I need, so that I could guide him into the role with small steps. But... He just can't do it. I don't know what to do. Can you make a Master? Is it something you already have to be born to do? Or, like a submissive, can they be made? I love him, I really do, but part of me is dying. Has anyone else ever had this problem? Have other slaves had to 'train' a Master? Are there Masters out there who were led to this life? Can anyone help? Because at this point I don't know what I should do... Should I stay because I love him, and let myself go unfulfilled, should I learn to live without this part of me? 25 Feb 11, 9:02 AM submissiveOne US(NY), 16 mths Y! Iam like that currently. He is new but doesn't train me or command me. Idk what to do but I wouldn't try to train him 25 Feb 11, 9:08 AM Nyx_Archer US(OH), 15 mths Sighs~ Well at least I am not the only one with this problem. Is yours trying at least? Mine just doesn't seem like he even wants to. 25 Feb 11, 9:19 AM submissiveOne US(NY), 16 mths Y! Nyx_Archer wrote: Sighs~ Well at least I am not the only one with this problem. Is yours trying at least? Mine just doesn't seem like he even wants to. [/quote. Sadly no he isn't and I'm fustrated 25 Feb 11, 9:32 AM deaincaelo US(VA), 17 mths Simply put, you can't turn someone into something they don't want to be. If they WANT to learn, then yes. It is a skill that can be acquired by someone with the potential in them. 25 Feb 11, 9:51 AM Nyx_Archer US(OH), 15 mths shadowfairy4ever wrote: [/quote. Sadly no he isn't and I'm fustrated I feel the same way. deaincaelo wrote: Simply put, you can't turn someone into something they don't want to be. If they WANT to learn, then yes. It is a skill that can be acquired by someone with the potential in them. That makes sense Dea. I guess the question is do I keep pushing the issue or let it go? I'm not sure at this point. It just doesn't seem like he has it in him to be what I need in that way. But I love him- it's so confusing. Edited 25 Feb 11, 9:52 AM by Nyx_Archer 25 Feb 11, 11:53 AM 913-643-445 UK, 18 mths How about a mentor to guide the said person..............but as has been said above if a person does not wish to be a certain way then no amount of guidance will make them that way. A mentor could help them if its just the way is not known..... but as for changing the way a Master does things ........why would you want to, and if you do is there not a bigger problem. Sorry, probably not the answers anyone was looking for but just the way my thought patterns are going today. saffy for Him with my heart , mind , body and soul always . 25 Feb 11, 1:11 PM 501-475-861 US(MA), 2 yrs Greetings Nyx, I humbly offer my insight. I have been with my Master for 25 years, married for over 20. We faced a similar problem, although he was afraid that I wouldn't be interested. I can't stress enough how important communication is. One person cannot change another persons' character. You can only change yourself. You can subtly defer all important decisions to your beloved. You can make sure that he wants for nothing, in and out of the bedroom. As you seek his advice and guidance, his confidence in his own abilities will grow. Another site, which I am NOT involved with in any way, but do find helpful, is http://www.submissiveguide.com Life is a journey. Take it one step at a time. Dj 25 Feb 11, 8:46 PM submissiveOne US(NY), 16 mths Y! Nyx_Archer wrote: shadowfairy4ever wrote: [/quote. Sadly no he isn't and I'm fustrated I feel the same way. deaincaelo wrote: Simply put, you can't turn someone into something they don't want to be. If they WANT to learn, then yes. It is a skill that can be acquired by someone with the potential in them. That makes sense Dea. I guess the question is do I keep pushing the issue or let it go? I'm not sure at this point. It just doesn't seem like he has it in him to be what I need in that way. But I love him- it's so confusing. That is,exactly how I'm currently feeling as well, I want him to be my dom and soon my master but training, commands arnt there 26 Feb 11, 11:05 AM Pedro91 FR, 18 mths A slave training a Master? seriously!!! You are born Master even if you don't know it, otherwise you will never be a Real one. Good feels good. And you not feeling good because that situation its just not good for you. So Its time to STOP... IT. Be happy, serve well ! 26 Feb 11, 2:47 PM Malkinius US(IL), 5 yrs Greetings Pedro... Pedro91 wrote: A slave training a Master? seriously!!! You are born Master even if you don't know it, otherwise you will never be a Real one. Good feels good. And you not feeling good because that situation its just not good for you. So Its time to STOP... IT. Be happy, serve well ! What a steaming load of BS. Being the Master to a slave or even a sub is a learned set of skills. It helps to be naturally dominant but anyone capable of learning and who works at learning the skills can do it better than the average "Master". Now....as for the OP....getting the boyfriend, SO or husband to become your Master just because you want him to master you will fail. Period. The chances of it breaking the two of you apart because you tried it are pretty high. The previous statements that it will only work if HE wants it to work and HE is willing to put in the months of study needed to really learn how is correct. Exactly who teaches him and how he learns can vary and yes, a slave can help a person learning mastery but it is best if most of that help comes from someone who is not currently his slave unless she is very experienced in teaching the subject. Even then, she is still not the best choice. Next warning. When you try to mix love with mastery, love usually wins and the mastery goes away. If you are lucky you stay kinky in the bedroom and maybe a bit of other play outside of the bedroom. The chances of real enslavement to this guy, given your circumstances, are next to none. It can happen but everything is working against it. Be well.... Malkinius Next page