KinkPodcasts.com - podcasts about BDSM, Fetish and Kink    [other banners]

	TSR : Web boards : M/s D/s O&P : "Masters/Mistresses who command Mastery?" 1 2 Masters/Mistresses who command Mastery? (16) This post is on the M/s D/s O&P web board. 21 Jul 10, 12:55 AM valhalla 23 mths 514-276-417, I had to stop and think several minutes on my answer to your question. I had one which wanted to fly right to print, but I hesitated, wanting to make sure I had not only a true answer from me, as me, but one that opened up an area I had not thought about often to think on later. As sub, my first reaction is that I could not do it. It is so against my natural Spirit, it would be impossible to make happen in body and words. Then thinking on it, I had to remember, I am often Dominant in the vanilla world. Both in my jobs, casual and close friendships and recreation. I tangle with all manner of people in a rough and tumble environment where one can not back down and remain true to Self. So if I can be Dominant in vanilla affairs, why do I believe I can never be Dominant if asked by my Master? So after thinking many minutes on this, I have this to offer.I am so strong a woman in vanilla life, and have searched for so long for a man whom I could trust as Master to be stronger than I, to have Him place Himself in a sub position to me, for even a short period of time, would do me great harm psychologically in the relationship. I would no doubt experience a loss of respect for the man I desperately need to be Stronger and more Powerful than I. If the man I would choose to be my Master could turn over the reigns to me, I fear and am certain, I would never give them back. He would have ceased being the one man who could cause me to step down and back into my natural Spirit, He would have become the man who pushed me up and out of the one place I have sought for a lifetime to return to. This is only for my life. This speaks to the lives of no others. I am a product of my many years, and could never again respect a man who would do such a thing to me, if I have given Him the trust needed to make me sub to Him. Thank you for a very thought provoking question. I learned something about myself from it,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,v 21 Jul 10, 6:49 AM 514-276-417 US(MI), 22 mths Dear valhalla, I am humbled and honored that my query might provoke such thought and self-reflection. I would like you to know that I deeply appreciate your effort to take time to consider your answer. It is a very difficult idea for me! I used to be dominant in my vanilla world--always organizing and instigating and planning. Recently, I've become a vanilla submissive AND a lifestyle submissive, and there is still some ambiguity in my relationship with regards to dominance. I wish things were cut and dry, but in my life, they aren't. It pleases me to know that there is another whose life contains shades of grey--or that there is someone who has two personae--one in public, and one at home. I suppose most of us present ourselves in public in a different way than we are pleased to be in private. Thank you again, valhalla! 21 Jul 10, 7:50 AM valhalla 23 mths You are most welcome 514-276-417. Often times we do not think much on our own makings until another provokes in us a need to look at ourselves. This was just such a time. I would never have taken a Dominant stance in the vanilla world if I had had any choice. I was forced by circumstances in life to take the Alpha role in my family. Three children needing care does not leave one much room for dancing. I was out of my league, stressed almost to the breaking point.If there was an area in my life that could be dysfunctional, then it was. (lol)I didn't see much of a way out. So I learned to fight and overcome and survive, taking my children with me. Somehow, by the grace of God I am sure, we made it intact. It is only now that they are grown (the youngest is 22) that I can think to return to what I know to be my natural Spirit. So I am letting go of the Dominant tendencies I have held to me for so long. I can not release them all at once though. I must say though, those that know me are baffled. They see the change in me and can't "understand" it. They attribute it to all manner of ailment (LWJ). They are convinced I'm suffering from some form of mental derangement LOLOLOL. The woman they know as a fighter and overachiever seems to have left the building with Elvis. LOL "I" on the other hand, have never been more sure or more right about what it is I need to be the woman I was destined to become before "Life" interfered. Thank You again,.......................v **LWJ/laughing with joy..... Edited 21 Jul 10, 7:53 AM by valhalla 22 Jul 10, 5:13 AM tia1982 AU, 2 yrs 184-503-394 wrote: i have Topped my Lord a few times. He is a switch with more Dominant tendings. It was difficult for me to do it (i don't like hurting anyone, especially Him, at all). Eventually, i learned how to just 'play' the role. Although, i'm not fond of it, i will do it for Him. My Sir is also a bit of a switch, mainly Dom. I have had 3 experiences in our 5mths together (I was new to this when we met) and I agree totally with the above. The 2nd time I tested out the floggers etc which he uses on me, and it took me a while to be comfortable with the idea of doing that to him before I suggested I was ready (always leaves it up to me to tell him when I have an idea/scenario). In the rest of life I am a bit Dom so not too hard for me to take control if needed, just the idea of flogging him was hard. The other two have been more senses/blindfolds etc so they are easier to do. He loves seeing me dressed up and taking control, and I get a kick out of knowing I am making him extremely happy and getting that reaction. I definitely prefer him being the Dom though, would not change that for the world! 28 Jul 10, 1:51 AM MeluthTur US(TN), 6 yrs £ Y! I have had sub/slaves top other s-types a few times...The reasoning was in seeing an inner desire of them come out in either being their Mentor/Guardian or Trainer. This inner desire obviously leaned towards a Dom heart rather than a submissive heart which on occassion can get confused by a new entry into the lifestyle. I know their can be an argument made by some in the Old Guard that all can become sub to Dom with the proper training. However I do not believe this personally and think that in the rush to enter the lifestyle, little heart spoken signs get ignored. I will say that tho not an Old Guard, I do not argue the point as it almost falls in the same category as a religious belief. Ussually no one wins the arguement. And all become irritated. I will always respect those that have other beliefs in the lifestyle. That is what makes this such a great community. *** After a short interlude of thinking*** I've asked 5 to top and was only right twice. ACK! Respectfully MeluthTur Edited 1 Aug 10, 3:43 AM by MeluthTur 28 Jul 10, 5:32 PM Sprite US(OH), 2 yrs oh wow...this girl thinks if she were asked she would try really hard but things just wouldn't sound or look right. she knows Master would not ask her to do such but if He did He would get a laugh because His girl does not have a single dominant bone in her body. If she were ever put in a situation where it were two slaves and one had to top she would ask to be the bottom even still. This girl is a bit envious of those slaves who have that inner strength to be able to top when commanded to do so. she does love how even though W/we are all in the same lifestyle, how W/we choose to live it differ greatly. This girl hopes your day is well. -Master's pet Always-