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	TSR : Web boards : O&P : "Grieving for lost freedom" 1 2 Grieving for lost freedom (12) This post is on the O&P web board. 8 Oct 10, 8:28 PM Tanos UK, 14 yrs Y! Gavriel wrote: Has anyone else noticed this? No and you've made a fascinating observation Regards, Tanos www.tanos.org.uk O&P: Possession. Ownership. Consent. Responsibility. Respect. House. Service. Dignity. Authenticity. Rituals. 8 Oct 10, 9:09 PM mia UK, 11 yrs mia wrote: Hi As someone who wanted and craved total submission to my master, i can identify completely with the gradual realisation of some freedoms being lost akin to grieving. Some things i had to give up were and continue to be easier than others, but there are some things i still find difficult. It was these things that still continue to 'pinch' that i got most upset by, despite the idea of them in theory being some of the hottest things about him controlling me. I have no access to my own money or bank anymore. As someone very financially independant before, this was very difficult to get my head around when it kicked in that this was forever. I came in from work one day, near the start of me living with him and i cried and cried and it wasn't because i wanted to buy anything and he wasn't letting me, it wasn't cos i needed to buy anything or anything similar it all. It was the realisation that something this big, something this basic to most people, had been taken from me and that in order to be in the relationship i need with the man i love, i had to submit to this. I realised this was not something just connected to orgasms, pain, lust, etc... It was very real and very difficult, not to mention, very permanent. None of what i've explained means i'm a shit slave or that Tanos and i aren't right for each other, or that he should go easier on me, or that i should have more limits, or whatever. It means i have gone through a transition of having had (access to) something to not having it ever again. I'd say that sounds very much like grieving to me. In the same way that if you loose a person, eventually you just get on with things and you get happy again, but there are also days when it gets hard again. x Edited to make sense. I've added the bold bits. x