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	TSR : Web boards : O&P : "collars" 1 2 collars (20) This post is on the O&P web board. 22 Mar 10, 4:41 PM Tanos UK, 14 yrs Y! 309-373-611 wrote: collars I'm new to this I've seen a few collars which I've liked very much although I'm not technically a slave to a Mistress or Master is it acceptable to wear a collar even though your not owned by a Master or Mistress 309-373-611 Lots of people have posted that in BDSM you can do what you want, which of course you can. However, you posted this on the O&P board, and I would say that in O&P it would be inauthentic for someone to wear a symbol of ownership or possession like a collar when they're not owned or possessed. Regards, Tanos www.tanos.org.uk O&P: Possession. Ownership. Consent. Responsibility. Respect. House. Service. Dignity. Authenticity. Rituals. 22 Mar 10, 5:08 PM curious_bina US(TN), 2 yrs Tanos wrote: 309-373-611 wrote: collars I'm new to this I've seen a few collars which I've liked very much although I'm not technically a slave to a Mistress or Master is it acceptable to wear a collar even though your not owned by a Master or Mistress 309-373-611 Lots of people have posted that in BDSM you can do what you want, which of course you can. However, you posted this on the O&P board, and I would say that in O&P it would be inauthentic for someone to wear a symbol of ownership or possession like a collar when they're not owned or possessed. Regards, Tanos Agreed with Tanos. Since your question was categorized to O&P to wear a collar would be meaningless; false. Can't put a tag on something that's unowned. Also agree with the previous post. If slaves/subs started wearing collars just to wear them as a "fashion accessory" it would lose the symbolic meaning. Maybe wearing a jewelry choker wouldn't be bad, it wouldn't be the exact same. -s Always the curious one ~ s 24 May 10, 12:54 PM FaolanUK UK, 5 yrs 333-528-841 wrote: ... I am taking a guess that this is directed towards me... No, it wasn't. As a general rule of thumb, if I commented on something that was written, and you didn't write it, I didn't direct it at you. But it does bring me on to an associated subject. Often I find that people will take themselves, and therefore their interests, far to seriously. I think it is to be discouraged. That one was. Tanos wrote: ...However, you posted this on the O&P board, and I would say that in O&P it would be inauthentic for someone to wear a symbol of ownership or possession like a collar when they're not owned or possessed... They could, of course, have posted in O&P becuase they wanted to know if a collar can ONLY be used as a symbol of O&P and, if it was offensive to those who used it as an O&P symbol for them to use it for another, perhaps "lesser" significance. My personal opinion is, if I found it offensive that someone wore a collar, or any other item, I wouldn't look. Life is for enjoying, and so I repeat. If you want to wear a collar, and it gives you enjoyment, do. P.S., I love your stuff tanos. Edited 24 May 10, 1:03 PM by FaolanUK 24 May 10, 3:55 PM 220-430-196 US(WI), 2 yrs I agree with some of the others, you can wear what you want, but it will have more meaning if you wait until a Master collars you. In my case, Master wants to collar me, but has not found one He really likes for when W/we are together. i came across a simple link bracelet that i wear for now. Master says it reminds Him of a chain a slave might have worn long ago although it's size is proportionate to my smallish wrists, not being a delicate chain but not so heavy as to raise questions. i wear it daily to remind me at all times that i am a slave and belong to Him. When i feel stressed, i often kiss the bracelet and it reminds me of His faith in me. i have been approached several times and, during conversations, asked whether the bracelet has special connotations. While i am always able to reply that it reminds me of my connection to Master, if you wore something similar, not only would it be a constant reminder to you of your status as an unowned slave, but could possibly attract the attention of others in the lifestyle, opening the door to a possible connection. 30 Aug 10, 11:56 PM chrystal_HMLK US(IL), 5 yrs It is my personal opinion that you should not wear a collar while unowned. One, because that puts you more off limits if you are looking for an owner. Two, because a collar is symbolic of the relationship and shows that you are owned and your owner. kallisto 31 Aug 10, 5:47 AM bastets_daughter 2 yrs whilst unowned, i wore a leather collar with an o-ring (i believe you can see it some of my pics), and to me it rather intensely symbolised 'owning myself' or being my own Master, for the time in which there were no other decent candidates. In light of other issues i had going on, this symbol gave me the strength to make the decisions i needed to to survive - and i would have been very hurt to discover than anyone thought my use of a collar in such a way to be inauthentic. Any potential Masters i spoke with were made aware of my collars meaning and we all continued under the assumption that it would eventually be replaced by the right Master's collar. I have never found it to hinder any of my interactions with Dominants or Masters and i certainly hope that those of you lucky individuals who have *already* found the right Master and earned his collar wont look down on me for it. my advice would be to discover what your collar would mean to you....really, really think about what you're after in this lifestyle, what will make you happiest as a human being, and then make your decision. 1 Sep 10, 6:30 PM 564-105-897 FR, 4 yrs I find it interesting to contrast collar I am a subject without a collar that looks Mistress put him in a discreet subject I will be his to whom it will be THE Mistress I love bondage with rope bondage cbt chains with but not too hard (at the beginning then we'll see) I am pierced nipples and sex I'm opposed to the laying of new 18 Sep 10, 3:08 PM 783-203-909 US(RI), 3 yrs Y! jjsslave wrote: Personally while you can wear anything you want i find it disrespectful to sub/slaves out there that have earned their Masters collar and by wearing it as fetish wear not only sends the wrong signals to potential Masters but makes me wonder if you truly understand what a collar means and represents. Masters collar is something that i take pride in wearing as it belongs to Him and he is my universe. For U/us it symbolizes a relationship that will endure through this lifetime and beyond, much more significant than any wedding ring could say. this girl agrees... she still has her previous collar from her previous owner...the moment they decided that it was not working for them (the relationship in general vanilla AND lifestyle wise) she removed it and put it away. he let her keep it as a reminder of what they had when it was good....but she never ever wears it *JUST* to wear it to symbolize her slave-hood...wearing it would not be a good thing.....in this girls eyes, it would not be good to wear a collar if you are not owned but that is her opinion...it would make it more special for an owner to collar you then to have you wear a collar on your own...this girl likes the idea previously stated above about wearing a cat collar around your arm or ankle...she likes that idea. Edited 18 Sep 10, 5:34 PM by 783-203-909 18 Sep 10, 6:42 PM karmakitten US(WI), 20 mths Y! 333-528-841 wrote: Lots of people wear collars as a fashion accessory. You can wear what you want but if you are considering it to show your status as a slave, you may be seen as misleading. Also, if you are looking for a Master/Misstress, you might be putting yourself off limits. No M type (one worth having anyways) will approach a sub/slave who appears to belong to another. A collar given to a sub/slave, has a meaning behind it and is a symbol. It shows an ownership. Seeing this post and your previous one, you may benefit from doing some research on what this lifestyle is really about. Research, read and read some more. The seach on this site can help as well, there are many, many threads that may help you learn. I agree that slave status is most definitely first assessed from afar by whether the slave is wearing a collar. You would be doing yourself a disservice if looking for a Master/Mistress if you wore a collar "just because you liked how it looked." If you really like collars, it is my humble opinion that you crave a collar and go about getting one the hard way...for the hardest path is often the most rewarding. Earn a collar. It will delight you MUCH more than buyng and wearing your own! MastrJ45's slave, karmakitten 18 Oct 10, 4:11 AM MasterRusty US, 2 yrs My slave wears her collar when we are together in private, but unless at a BDSM party, she does not wear it out in public. she does however ,always wear a very petite handcuffs silver pendent, as a necklace, and is in actuality the collar i used the night we bacame Master/slave. Master Rusty; Alpha Male Master to Lovely slaves