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	TSR : Web boards : M/s D/s O&P : "Collars, Cuffs, Etc. In Public" 1 2 3 Collars, Cuffs, Etc. In Public (23) This post is on the M/s D/s O&P web board. Fri 5 Feb 10, 5:06 PM 834-243-250 2 yrs Hey guys, This is an offshoot of where the "eternity collar" thread started going and I wanted to start a discussion on it since it's off topic from what the OP had a question to begin with... My question is what are your thoughts on collars, cuffs, bells, etc. in public and in the work place? What are you thoughts on wearing traditional collars, public collars, etc. in public, at work, around family... Do people notice? Do you ever get harassed for it? Do you feel that most people don't notice it, and if they do or don't, what kind of collar do you wear in public? I hope this isn't too broad of a topic, but I would love to hear everyone's views on it. Thanks! - Slave In Training 5 Feb 10, 5:10 PM 834-243-250 2 yrs 834-243-250 wrote: wrote: SeanT70 wrote: wrote: jamesgirl wrote: wrote: that heaven's hell collar is absolutely gorgeous, i'll have to show Master.... i couldn't wear it out in public unfortunately but i'd be on cloud nine wearing it around the house... i think i'd stop at every mirror! lol *my bold for emphasis* Just for the sake of my own morbid curiosity, why couldn't you wear this out in public? The reason I ask, is, in this day and age, and in all walks of life people just have far too much going on in their own lives to worry about what the next person is doing, and they wouldn't gives two cents about what you're doing, wearing or whatever. In the main (although it could be because you're in a publically scrutinised job or what have you), when we hear about people saying this, it's more about them being self-conscious and 'thinking' about what people think, than what people actually do. Nothing like having a bit of pride in what we do, or what we wear; either way, like I said, I was merely curious. Regards, Sean. I have to say myself, working in the business world... it would draw the wrong kind of attention when I'm in a business meeting. Especially because I tend to work around a vast majority of men and need to be in similar standing and respect level of them to be able to do my job properly, I think it would be more of a distraction in that I would have to deal with men other than my Master assuming I am a doormat and they can walk over me even in a business setting. Those outside of the community I think tend to look at something like a collar on a woman and assume it means she bows down to every dick that passes by, which we know is not the case. Going out to a club at night, I would love to wear it. Going sightseeing, traveling, etc. I would love to wear it in public... but from a professional aspect, I feel it's something better left behind closed doors. I also don't know if I agree with the statement that people are too busy in their own lives to care about what others are doing... There are a lot of know it alls and nosey ninnies out there that really don't have anything better to do than get into your business and give you a hard time. It's unfortunate, but true. That is just my opinion though and would love to hear other's views on it. - Slave In Training This was where the discussion started so you know how this thread came about... - Slave In Training 5 Feb 10, 5:22 PM 976-188-983 US(ID), 4 yrs I wear a plain sterling silver celtic weave choker in public and private as my collar. People notice it all the time but only a few ever know what it represents in truth. I tell friends what it represents and occasionally a stranger if I get the impression they won't freak out on me. Either way I get comments on it all the time as to how beautiful it is and how unique. This though is only my primary collar, I have the option of changing my public collar to about a dozen other chokers and necklaces that I have designed. They all belong to Sir and each is recognized by the both of us as collars. Baby In his eyes I am lost, In his arms I am found, In his soul I am content. Kore ga Watashi no Goshujin-sama 5 Feb 10, 5:48 PM jamesgirl US(MO), 2 yrs SeanT70 wrote: wrote: jamesgirl wrote: wrote: that heaven's hell collar is absolutely gorgeous, i'll have to show Master.... i couldn't wear it out in public unfortunately but i'd be on cloud nine wearing it around the house... i think i'd stop at every mirror! lol *my bold for emphasis* Just for the sake of my own morbid curiosity, why couldn't you wear this out in public? The reason I ask, is, in this day and age, and in all walks of life people just have far too much going on in their own lives to worry about what the next person is doing, and they wouldn't gives two cents about what you're doing, wearing or whatever. In the main (although it could be because you're in a publically scrutinised job or what have you), when we hear about people saying this, it's more about them being self-conscious and 'thinking' about what people think, than what people actually do. Nothing like having a bit of pride in what we do, or what we wear; either way, like I said, I was merely curious. Regards, Sean. I'm gonna try to answer as best i can, i didn't actually see this post in the other thread >.> you deleted it i think but i hope you'd still like and answer from me :D just to give you an idea of where i live, an that yes they do notice simple things. one day i was at work, wearing a simple well.. gothic style cuff, very small almost like a bangle wasn't that big at all but it was leather and had a skull with chains... first day i wore it this old dude... looked at it then up to my face and back again and he says "what are you a dominatrix?" first reaction was you dirty ol perv how dare you even ask me a question like that at work, and second thought was, how the hell do you even get that from a little cuff like this? before you even ask if he was joking he had a dissapproving look on his face and was said in that tone of... condescending i guess would be the best way to put it. I live in the bible belt... gays get the shit beat out of them... i don't even want to think what would happen if i said i'm a slave....so i feel better, and safer and Master agree's with this it's safer, to not wear a collar that's publicly stating what i am.... i go too many places without him and i currently go to college and sometimes walk a short distance home at night... it'd be even scarier if people thought.... well i think you get the point, it's a bit personal from there but i think it's understandable? if not i suppose memo me i'll try to explain more My name is Master James, and I approve this message 5 Feb 10, 6:38 PM 000-671-955 CA, 7 yrs Y! 834-243-250 wrote: Collars, Cuffs, Etc. In Public Hey guys, This is an offshoot of where the "eternity collar" thread started going and I wanted to start a discussion on it since it's off topic from what the OP had a question to begin with... My question is what are your thoughts on collars, cuffs, bells, etc. in public and in the work place? What are you thoughts on wearing traditional collars, public collars, etc. in public, at work, around family... Do people notice? Do you ever get harassed for it? Do you feel that most people don't notice it, and if they do or don't, what kind of collar do you wear in public? I hope this isn't too broad of a topic, but I would love to hear everyone's views on it. Thanks! i have a few collars Master approves of, and some are very obvious to what they could be used for, as the one with "D" links around the leather. These are used when out in our Lifestyle groups, but i have some that i wear in public and at work, and have for many years. The people i work with have grown accustomed to them, and take little notice to them. The Eternity collar i wear when Master requests i do so and at times at work, and have only been asked a few times "Where did i get such a unique piece of jewellry". Master has on occaision put bells on my nipple rings, which made for a very interesting day at work, the fortunate part was it was near Christmas, and everyone thought that i was in the festive mood and had them pinned under my blouse. As for cuffs, Master had a set of custom cuffs of ornate metal made for my neck ankles and wrists, these i have worn, but not all at the same time, unless we are going to a Group Lifestyle function, you can see the wrist cuffs on my Slave Register picture. If you wear ankle cuffs with a short mini skirt, it will garner attention, but if you wear a longer skirt, chances are no one will notice, but again, it is usually up to Master in my case as to what attire he wishes. Good luck in your journey, and as in most cases, only the people in the "Know" will understand the true reason you have any of the prescribed apparell. Master's "o" 671955 Edited 5 Feb 10, 6:40 PM by 000-671-955 5 Feb 10, 8:13 PM 741-498-880 4 yrs I have worn the same (or almost the same) collar for the last 3 years. Master has changed it out a couple times, until he found "the perfect" all purpose one which is the one I now wear 24/7. They were just replaced with like a "fancier" stainless steel one kind of a thing. I've never had it taken off for more then like 30 seconds in the last 3 years. here's a picture of it. http://clanhdz.com/kajira/emma/2010/bookcover/ki... 5 Feb 10, 9:05 PM 834-243-250 2 yrs I love where this discussion is going! I currently wear a little leather thong with bells on it around my ankle... my roomate's dog went nuts the first time I went down the stairs, but no one has really questioned it, even when I wore it to work the other day. I wanted something as I am training with a Master to remind me of my place, even though I have not received a collar yet, and every time I hear the tinkling of the bells, it definitely brings a smile to my face. I think the type of collar definitely makes a difference. For me, one example is that I LOVED the Tiffany & Co. locks they came out with recently, and at one point was wearing the lock on a fairly close fitting choker (I purchased it for myself primarily as a fashion accessory when they first came out... I loved the subtlety of it...). Maybe this is where my apprehension to wearing things that were potentially revealing in public came from, but the questions... the looks, and the reactions were unexpected to say the least... at least from the men. Most women thought the jewelry gorgeous. I thought it was subtle, fun, and from such a high end jewelry manufacturer, who would question it, right? Not so right... I had a boss approach me and make advances that were VERY much unwanted... and as he did, he grabbed my necklace, toying with the little silver lock... He knew I was single, and took it I think as an invitation instead of as a statement of IE. I wore it for me, but he took it the wrong way. I spent the next 2 months avoiding him as much as I could when others weren't around, but it gave the wrong impression... His attitude changed in regard to me completely. He stopped listening to my suggestions and advice (be it that I thwarted his advances, or that he look at me as though he could walk over me and it not be a problem, I am not sure... I can only guess) but ultimately I left the job. I think even something as small and simple like that had given one person very much the wrong impression. Now, I have worn that same lock, but on a much simpler, lower hanging chain that looks nothing like a collar (the other one was a substantial chain that sat right at the base of my neck) and have rarely had anyone ask about it. I think definitely the situation, the collar style itself, the people you are around, etc. all play into how people view and react to someone that they may consider "submissive" by outward denotations. I think for me, general public appearances have little to no weight on me, but BUSINESS impressions still weigh heavily. The Master I am training with has requested I continue to reflect on this topic (after an hour long "disagreement" that we had... where I was mostly being an obstinate bitch and not trusting him to make good decisions... I really don't "give in" easily and need to work on that). I'm glad to hear everyone else's experiences though. Thank you all so much for sharing! - Slave In Training Edited 5 Feb 10, 9:09 PM by 834-243-250 5 Feb 10, 9:50 PM SeanT70 9 yrs jamesgirl wrote: SeanT70 wrote: wrote: jamesgirl wrote: wrote: that heaven's hell collar is absolutely gorgeous, i'll have to show Master.... i couldn't wear it out in public unfortunately but i'd be on cloud nine wearing it around the house... i think i'd stop at every mirror! lol Massive snips because while posts are well explained, they are actually irrelevant (not in content but in context), and I'll take a second to explain why the post noted isn't present in the other thread below.. You're fully justified in what you're saying and I can understand that. The reason the post referred to isn't present in the other thread is because when I'd written it, I hadn't actually looked at the collar in question, and having done so (pretty much as soon as I'd posted), deleted it immediately given that I certainly wouldn't have my girl wear that in public (she has a Turian Collar for most purposes), nor in a workplace (if she was ever in a position to keep a job that is!), and so, I apologise for the deletion, and subsequent lack of continuity. I simply should've looked first, but didn't. Deletion of posts isn't my normal style, and seriously, you guys must've seen what I'd written on that thread very quickly! Back to where the thread was... Regards, Sean. 5 Feb 10, 10:52 PM 834-243-250 2 yrs SeanT70 wrote: jamesgirl wrote: SeanT70 wrote: wrote: jamesgirl wrote: wrote: that heaven's hell collar is absolutely gorgeous, i'll have to show Master.... i couldn't wear it out in public unfortunately but i'd be on cloud nine wearing it around the house... i think i'd stop at every mirror! lol Massive snips because while posts are well explained, they are actually irrelevant (not in content but in context), and I'll take a second to explain why the post noted isn't present in the other thread below.. You're fully justified in what you're saying and I can understand that. The reason the post referred to isn't present in the other thread is because when I'd written it, I hadn't actually looked at the collar in question, and having done so (pretty much as soon as I'd posted), deleted it immediately given that I certainly wouldn't have my girl wear that in public (she has a Turian Collar for most purposes), nor in a workplace (if she was ever in a position to keep a job that is!), and so, I apologise for the deletion, and subsequent lack of continuity. I simply should've looked first, but didn't. Deletion of posts isn't my normal style, and seriously, you guys must've seen what I'd written on that thread very quickly! Back to where the thread was... Regards, Sean. My bad! We are having a bit of a "snow day" here so I am stuck at home with nothing better to do... Guess I caught it a bit quickly... Thanks for posting though! - Slave In Training 6 Feb 10, 2:17 AM slave_of_The_Tesh US(FL), 2 yrs My collar is a home-made chain with a padlock (see my photos), and I seldom take it off. Once in a while to clean it, or to switch it out for a more office-appropriate one for job interviews. I get a few comments here and there, but for the most part no one notices (or says anything, if they do notice). His Beloved Owned and loved by The_Tesh This post has probably been edited for spelling/grammar because I'm weird like that. 6 Feb 10, 3:59 AM TunaBug US(CA), 2 yrs Well because of the way this neko dresses (mostly Gothic/Metal head) this neko is able to get away with a spiked leather collar which neko wears most of the time. This neko does have a regular dog collar with a tag and bell for when neko is with Owner. I wait day by day for my Death and when He arrives I will welcome Him with open arms. [IN NOMINE DEI NOSTRE SATANAS EXCELSI!] "Look down at me, you see a fool. Look up at me, you see your Lord. Look straight at me, you see yourself." - Charles Manson Next page