This page sponsored by JT's Stockroom    [other banners]

	TSR : Web boards : M/s D/s O&P : "Dishonest DOM/Daddy" 1 2 Dishonest DOM/Daddy (12) This post is on the M/s D/s O&P web board. 29 Jul 09, 12:39 AM pinklucy UK, 3 yrs Hi sidney, I can't tell from your profile or posts what the exact nature of your relationship is and whether your dynamic is 24/7. If it is, then something which struck me is that it sounds as if your Dom may be having some issues of confidence with his dominance. My Mistress and I were quite surprised to realise over a year into our relationship that being dominant in a genuine day to day way still felt quite difficult for her. She had spent a lot of time 'enchanting' me, as she puts it. Luring me into feeling comfortable and happy with the submission I desired. It takes her a long time to trust and believe that someone genuinely wants to submit to *her* and not just a fantasy. Once she realised her work was done and here I was ready and willing to genuinely submit to her she felt a little lost for a while as she worked out how to change gears and lay claim to the genuine day to day dominance she so richly deserved. I wonder if your Dom is feeling something similar? If he felt confident he would be able to calmly tell you his desire to go and socialise for an evening and then go out and enjoy it secure in the knowledge that you submit to his desires willingly. perhaps the question for you to ask yourself as a submissive is 'how can I enable him to feel secure and confident in his dominance?' Sometimes I feel my submission more on the evenings when my Mistress tells me to go home because she has other plans than I do on the evenings when she tells me to come round because she wants me to be there for her. I understand that being lied to is hurtful, and anything which makes you doubt the trust you place in your Dom is frightening. If you can look at this from a submissive angle though perhaps it would help how you feel about it? Rather than 'he has done something wrong, I feel awful!' how about 'Something made my Dom feel he had to lie? Can I help him with that?' 29 Jul 09, 2:05 PM sidney 3 yrs My Daddy and I are both new to the lifestyle. W/we were already D/s naturally but putting a label on it and I truly taking care of him is new. I think we A/all carry some baggage from O/our past relationships. His ex was fueled with drama. She lived for it and she always had motives behind EVERYTHING she did. I think my Daddy is waiting for the other shoe to drop and for me to change. He is having issues with the fact that I'm sweet and nice most of the time. Even in my time of hurt and anger I bring it up to Him in a respectful calm manner. He is not use to this and it catches Him of guard... Only time will allow Him to trust that I am who I say I am. Also I'm working on trusting Him. The lie itself was not the hard part.... It's the fact that I do have some trust issues and the dishonesty only added fuel to the fire. I do think my Daddy has some insecurities with His capability to Dominate me.......but I also think it has to do with trusting that I truly want that. He and I were in a some what vanilla relationship and W/we have discussed that W/we don't want to hurt what W/we have in anyway. Be Well sidney