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	TSR : Web boards : M/s D/s O&P : "Just being human?" 1 2 3 Just being human? (26) This post is on the M/s D/s O&P web board. Mon 29 Jun 09, 6:20 PM tigermonkey US(MN), 2 yrs I have been in a lot of BDSM forums lately, so I guess that means I have been doing lots of reading on how others treat their subs/slaves. Now I understand that that sub/slave is lower in the power level of the relationship, as is par for this kinda relationship. Now what I do not understand is what I have been terming lose of basic human rights. For example, the word I. Why is it when in those forums the sub/slave types i not I. I mean be for the fact it looks like bad grammar in a sentence, why did this person lose their basic human right to be a complete I. As well as Y/you, when did the Master/Dom once again become more then who they are and in the middle of a sentence get a capital Y in front of you. When talking I do not make it clear this Y is better then that y. Not to mention this kinda silly behavior in typing makes these said posts hard to read. Now I do believe there are somethings that deserve that difference, I will not degrade this in any way. Then there is this stuff about gifts at random times for no reason for the sub/slave. Now here would be a lose of what I see from the Master/Doms as a lose of basic human rights. To some extent they have feelings for this person they call property (well I don't my sub is still human and I can't have human property I think its the whole free will thing) or however they choose to term this person. Why are they no longer aloud to give this said person a gift just because they decided to. When did that stop being doable in the relationship, due to the fact it is a relationship be it complicated it is still a relationship. I read that some slaves/subs consider this to be hard on them, because they do not see how they have earned or deserved this gift. So serving someones every need, and when you cant or do it wrong you get punished in ways many people would frown and run away from is not a form of earning this said gift? Just can not figure all this stuff out. I am not one to look down on others relationships, I am in a D/s relationship as well. But I guess what I can't figure out is when did the people in these kinds of relationships lose the very thing that makes them humans and people, with feelings and wants and needs that every human being has. Even infants have a sense of individuality, why when a person says yes I need this in my life, I need to be controlled/control and loved like this, do they lose that right to be a complete I and individual that they once were and become something I see as being less then complete in who they are. How is it they lost this one basic human right to be themselves? 29 Jun 09, 6:44 PM subbymentalist US(LA), 5 yrs They are still themselves. For some people, it just pleases them to be referred to as property and to be constantly reminded of that status. Hence the "bad grammar" thing. Whether I choose to be I or i when talking to you or You, I am still me and always will be. - [Tm] 29 Jun 09, 8:57 PM Cryptic1 US, 3 yrs I guess from my point of view, that is what makes this lifestyle great. Each set of people have rules that they are comfortable with and agree too. Your relationship is yours mine is mine and others are others. I guess some people in a sub position like the way things are and do not feel less of a person for what they like. Little things like grammar seem to be a little thing in life to worry about. If my brat were worried about little things like grammar...I think we would have bigger issues to discuss. Owner of bratitude...how sweet it is 29 Jun 09, 9:13 PM His_caethes 2 yrs I am my own individual person separate from my Owner. I have my own thoughts and feelings and I may refer to myself any way I see fit. Every couple has their own dynamic in a D/s relationship, just because it is my choice to submit to my D does not mean I have lost myself as a person. I still think the same, feel the same and act quite actually like myself. I do everything in my power to also please my Domme and if I fail then either I was not aware of everything the task entailed or I just got sloppy in what I was supposed to be doing. When I do step out of line or break a rule I am corrected accordingly and when he does something to my dislike I also have my say in what went on. Some in the D/s relationship are more involved in the Dynamic and I think that is why their submissives/slaves lose their identity and blend or meld in with their Owner/Domme. in the circle of my arms he shall have all my pleasures all his desires fulfilled. in his heart i shall have all the love i need in his eyes i shall forever be his collared one ~ Aaron's Pet 29 Jun 09, 10:55 PM SL_precious CA, 3 yrs tigermonkey wrote: Just being human? Why is it when in those forums the sub/slave types i not I. I mean be for the fact it looks like bad grammar in a sentence, why did this person lose their basic human right to be a complete I. As well as Y/you, when did the Master/Dom once again become more then who they are and in the middle of a sentence get a capital Y in front of you. When talking I do not make it clear this Y is better then that y. i think maybe i can clarify at least why Master and i use this style of address when writing.. Perhaps you are reading to much into it...i have never considered my human identity lost or that He was "better" or more worthy as a human being...it is more a matter of respect and devotion...i do address Him as Master or You in text and myself as i...it is a warm reminder of my place with Him and who we are to each other, it does not reflect my value as a person..only my position within our relationship. It is something we do privately or in a community forum, it certainly does not spill over into more formal writing where "proper grammar " would be expected. Also in some online forums or chat rooms it is encouraged, simply because it is an easy way to identify it's members as either D/s ..saves asking..lol SL_precious 29 Jun 09, 11:09 PM moebius_slave US(LA), 3 yrs tigermonkey wrote: For example, the word I. Why is it when in those forums the sub/slave types i not I. I mean be for the fact it looks like bad grammar in a sentence, why did this person lose their basic human right to be a complete I. As well as Y/you, when did the Master/Dom once again become more then who they are and in the middle of a sentence get a capital Y in front of you. for me, the use of lowercase 'i' is just the way i type, lol, i make more typos if i worry too much about capitalization. as for capitalizing 'Master' or 'Him', its just how i put emphasis on it, kinda hard to emphasize things just in type and again, it takes me longer when i have to look up the iccode (for bold, italics, etc). i was terrified when Master and i got serious, afraid that i would lose who i was...what makes me...well...me. i did not lose anything at all, in fact i gained a whole other side of myself. and the more i am as a person, the more i have to give Him. now the S/slashy S/speak...i did that when i first came to the boards here because i thought it 'proper'. the is the first (and only) M/s relationship ive ever been in or will ever be in, i wanted to do everything just right, to fit in....now i think if i did that my Master would be wondering who replaced His sassy slave with a look alike, lol! now i realize there is no 'protocol' for being in the relationship i have with my Master, we are us and that's all we need. The devil came to me last night and asked what I wanted in exchange for my soul. I still can't believe I said pizza. Friggin' cravings. 29 Jun 09, 11:38 PM Sklavos_mou_Kyriah 3 yrs Actually I had to stop referring to myself in the third person and to use correct grammar some time ago, ergo a decree from Lady Mistress. Now I refer to myself in the first person with the capital "I" and considering the only name I am called is "Slave" then it has to be with a capital "S". In the "Chapter of Faults" punishment session I am sometimes subjected to a tirade about bad grammar and incorrect syntax. In fact, only this morning I was on my knees being subjected to this. Why? Because I had used American terminology. I said "period" instead of "full stop" in the course of conversation. I am in the UK after all. To be a true slave is to be truly free Slave/Sklavos 30 Jun 09, 12:21 AM Ou_pais US, 5 yrs tigermonkey wrote: Just being human? I have been in a lot of BDSM forums lately, so I guess that means I have been doing lots of reading on how others treat their subs/slaves. Now I understand that that sub/slave is lower in the power level of the relationship, as is par for this kinda relationship. Now what I do not understand is what I have been terming lose of basic human rights. For example, the word I. Why is it when in those forums the sub/slave types i not I. I mean be for the fact it looks like bad grammar in a sentence, why did this person lose their basic human right to be a complete I. As well as Y/you, when did the Master/Dom once again become more then who they are and in the middle of a sentence get a capital Y in front of you. When talking I do not make it clear this Y is better then that y. Not to mention this kinda silly behavior in typing makes these said posts hard to read. Now I do believe there are somethings that deserve that difference, I will not degrade this in any way. Then there is this stuff about gifts at random times for no reason for the sub/slave. Now here would be a lose of what I see from the Master/Doms as a lose of basic human rights. To some extent they have feelings for this person they call property (well I don't my sub is still human and I can't have human property I think its the whole free will thing) or however they choose to term this person. Why are they no longer aloud to give this said person a gift just because they decided to. When did that stop being doable in the relationship, due to the fact it is a relationship be it complicated it is still a relationship. I read that some slaves/subs consider this to be hard on them, because they do not see how they have earned or deserved this gift. So serving someones every need, and when you cant or do it wrong you get punished in ways many people would frown and run away from is not a form of earning this said gift? Just can not figure all this stuff out. I am not one to look down on others relationships, I am in a D/s relationship as well. But I guess what I can't figure out is when did the people in these kinds of relationships lose the very thing that makes them humans and people, with feelings and wants and needs that every human being has. Even infants have a sense of individuality, why when a person says yes I need this in my life, I need to be controlled/control and loved like this, do they lose that right to be a complete I and individual that they once were and become something I see as being less then complete in who they are. How is it they lost this one basic human right to be themselves? Last i heard, capital I is not a basic human right. English is unusual in capitalizing the first person singular pronoun. For me, i just type it how i feel it, and He allows me to. If you look at some of my older posts, you'll see in the past i did to have to write in third person. That was to help me remember that i should be thinking of Him first, that it wasn't all about me. It was to help me get out of the habit of saying "I want." In our relationship, His needs come before my needs and His wants definitely come before my wants! Of course i'm still human; otherwise i wouldn't need little linguistic tricks to help me remember that! ps--you'll notice that i don't do the slashy thing either. Master is the only one i capitalize for, just like He's the only one i call Master. Everyone else i try to treat with equal respect, M-type or s-type, and proper grammar! pais Edited 30 Jun 09, 12:24 AM by Ou_pais 30 Jun 09, 1:38 AM fireflies US(TX), 4 yrs i prefer to show my devotion and respect to my Master by using lowercase letters when referring to myself and capital letters when referring to Him. This was taught to me long ago, i am a slave and i belong to Him. i have done this for so long that it is second nature to me now, however in business communications i switch to the proper grammatical use of "I" without a thought. i am no less a person because of the punctuation i use when writing my Master or leaving a message on this website, but i am always an owned slave. None of this will matter anyway in 5 years, as with text messaging the Queen's English, as we know it, will be dead! i am my Master's tattooed and pierced slave. i am His, He owns ALL of me, i do everything i can to please Him. 30 Jun 09, 1:45 AM 976-188-983 US(ID), 3 yrs I am in the same boat as most everyone else here. My Master prefers me with an attitude and a basic human nature. He has instructed me to use proper english grammer which includes capitalizing "I" and the first letter of titles such as "Master", "Sir" and other such. I think that anyone who takes a persons basic human rights is not a dominant but an abuser, IMHO. I receive gifts from my Master as tokens of his love for me and I accept them as such, although I must admit to wonder at the gift when I have been less than fully submissive. I think you will find that most of us s-types still have free will and basic human rights and that most d-types want no other way. Baby In his eyes I am lost, In his arms I am found, In his soul I am content. Kore ga Watashi no Goshujin-sama 30 Jun 09, 2:05 AM EvaMaria US(CA), 3 yrs As has been already mentioned, I don't think this is the way of most relationships, but it's practiced enough to be a thing to ponder. I see the situation much as tigermonkey. The outward part of the practice varies in intensity from one relationship to another, but my impression is it's based on an idea that respect toward another involves diminishing one's self. As in, if one partner is shown to be "lesser" via speech and/or denial of an average psychology, the other automatically becomes "more". I don't think there's reality in the practice, but the larger indication makes it unacceptable for me. I consider M/s and D/s to be more of a practice involving assignations of authority and power rather than individual worth. The grammar business does annoy me. There are other, better ways (signature lines, icons) to communicate status in a relationship that wouldn't affect my ease of reading. Third-person speech is much the same to me. It's rarely done correctly or consistently and when used to make a statement of opinion or advice automatically creates a contradiction. Eva (The property formerly known as Camille ) Next page