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	TSR : Web boards : M/s D/s O&P : "The Mistress/slave in her" The Mistress/slave in her (7) This post is on the M/s D/s O&P web board. Sun 28 Jun 09, 4:11 PM mystyblu US(TX), 2 yrs .this girl has been lurking here for a while and has begun to add her voice to many of the posts here. With her Owners permission this girl would like to introduce herself and say hello and perhaps impose upon you for input/advice. .this girl has been in the lifestyle for 17 years. .this girl was in her mid 20's when she was able to find the definition that described many of her feelings, wants and needs as D/s. Over the years this girl has spoken with lots of friends and acquaintances that are in the lifestyle to learn, grow and share. It seems that most gravitate to Master/Dom or slave/submissive side as it applies to their own personalities. But, what if your personality has both elements? Being a switch can sometimes put this girl's emotions slightly at odds. .this girl “discussed” this concern with a Dom friend of hers some time go and he insisted that this girl had to pick either one or the other but this girl does not feel that is right. That would be denying a part of her that makes her unique. .this girl's feelings to be dominant are as strong as her feelings and needs to be possessed and owned. Luckily this girl is owned, loved and controlled by a wonderful Master that she is devoted to and he knows of her feelings to own and posses a slave of her own and has generously given his permission for her to seek one. .this girl's only concern is will she be able to server her Owners ever need as a slave and also serve her slaves needs as her Mistress?? .this girl would not want to find herself lacking on either account in a 24/7 real time situation. In the past this girl was either collared or was a Mistress but never at the same time. .this girl thanks you for your time and consideration. CSs_mystyone What lies behind us, and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us. ~ by Ralph Waldo Emerson ~ 28 Jun 09, 5:01 PM slave_of_The_Tesh US(FL), 2 yrs 160-631-592 wrote: .this girl's only concern is will she be able to server her Owners ever need as a slave and also serve her slaves needs as her Mistress?? .this girl would not want to find herself lacking on either account in a 24/7 real time situation. In the past this girl was either collared or was a Mistress but never at the same time. I've got a similar issue in that my Master is a switch who wants to play the slave sometimes. I'm not really a switch, though I'm learning to play Mistress when he needs it. So in short we're kinda each others' Owner and each others' slave. It's weird. Anyway. Best advice I can think to give you is to separate your two "identities." When you're with your Master, remember that you are His slave. When you are with your slave, remember that you are his/her Mistress. It will take some getting used to, but with time you should be able to handle the changeover just fine. I'm not sure how you would be able to manage a 24/7 in both at the same time. Discuss with your Master how He thinks you would be able to go about it without diminishing your service to him. He may be a source of valuable information, both in how to keep both parts of you alive and well, and in how to handle your slave, when you acquire one. Good luck! Owned by The_Tesh This post has probably been edited for spelling/grammar because I'm weird like that. 1 Jul 09, 3:21 PM ravenkaldera US(MA), 6 yrs Lots of folks function in hierarchies, where they are under someone and over someone else. That can be a good place for a switch. The only question is working out where the chain of authority goes. -Raven Kaldera -If you're in charge, it's all on your head. If it's not all on your head, then you're not really in charge. 1 Jul 09, 4:36 PM His_caethes 2 yrs ravenkaldera wrote: Lots of folks function in hierarchies, where they are under someone and over someone else. That can be a good place for a switch. The only question is working out where the chain of authority goes. -Raven Kaldera My opinion and please feel free to correct me if I am wrong is that the ultimate power would go to the Master/Domme who is owner of the sub/Owner. in the circle of my arms he shall have all my pleasures all his desires fulfilled. in his heart i shall have all the love i need in his eyes i shall forever be his collared one ~ His_caethes 1 Jul 09, 6:14 PM SirSeven 2 yrs 160-631-592 wrote: .this girl has been lurking here for a while and has begun to add her voice to many of the posts here. With her Owners permission this girl would like to introduce herself and say hello and perhaps impose upon you for input/advice. Welcome. 160-631-592 wrote: Being a switch can sometimes put this girl's emotions slightly at odds. .this girl discussed this concern with a Dom friend of hers some time go and he insisted that this girl had to pick either one or the other but this girl does not feel that is right. That would be denying a part of her that makes her unique. I disagree with the advice that you must choose between one need or another. You can be owned by someone and still be dominant with someone else at the same time. There are no rules that say you must choose between one or the other. Whether or not you can comfortably manage this type of a situation is up to you. My advice would be to try taking on a submissive to fulfill your dominant needs, start slowly, and see how it goes. If it doesn't work out for whatever reason, well, at least you tried. His_caethes wrote: My opinion and please feel free to correct me if I am wrong is that the ultimate power would go to the Master/Domme who is owner of the sub/Owner. Not sure I correctly understand the point you are trying to make here ... but this is not necessarily true. This may be the case in some D/s relationships but not all. Sir Seven 1 Jul 09, 7:42 PM ravenkaldera US(MA), 6 yrs In some hierarchies, the Dom/me at the top has authority all the way down, and their authority trumps that of their sub's authority over the sub's slave. In others, the dom/me at the top agrees to concede all authority over their sub's slave - perhaps because that relationship is older, or because it's long-distance, or because that's just the way they all negotiated it. People do it the way that works for all of them. -Raven Kaldera -If you're in charge, it's all on your head. If it's not all on your head, then you're not really in charge. 1 Jul 09, 11:31 PM mystyblu US(TX), 2 yrs this girl thanks you all for your impute and advice. This particular situation like many in the D/s lifestyle the rules are based around the people in the relationship. this girl has discussed this issue at length with her Owner and is grateful for his much needed guidance. Master has clearly state the chain of command and that Master commands this girl and this girl commands her sub/slave. Master will only take a hand if/when absolutely necessary and that the sub/slave will be under this girl's total control. SirSeven wrote: My advice would be to try taking on a submissive to fulfill your dominant needs, start slowly, and see how it goes. If it doesn't work out for whatever reason, well, at least you tried. this girl agrees and plans to take it very slow. Master has restricted this girl's search for a sub/slave to online only at this point. CSs_mystyone What lies behind us, and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us. ~ by Ralph Waldo Emerson ~ Edited 1 Jul 09, 11:33 PM by mystyblu 2 Jul 09, 12:26 AM SgtMajorMaam UK, 2 yrs If you are a past Mistress and need to switch then you need to switch. If you Master is looking to take care of your emotional needs he should not find any difficulty in his heart to object to you doing so, however if you are owned by your Master then he should be given the final say who you choose to Dominate especially if it may conflict with his needs. Remember your obedience to him and as long as you can A/all accept the current hierarchy then it should all work out well. Best Wishes SgtMajorMa'am Edited 2 Jul 09, 12:28 AM by SgtMajorMaam