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	TSR : Web boards : M/s and D/s : "Need for Punishment?" 1 2 Need for Punishment? (17) Thu 21 May 09, 3:08 PM MyLordsClay US(FL), 22 mths i have read many posts concerning corporal punishment and how some slaves do not require that anymore. Some slaves say they feel so bad about disappointing their Masters - that that's punishment enough. i too feel awful when i've disappointed Master - but i've discovered that i need to "atone" for my mistake with pain or i will continue to feel bad and get depressed. A lot of the time Master does not feel that the error warrants corporal punishment and will use some other method for correction (standing in the corner, solitary, etc.). These methods help me think about my error, why it happened and how not to do it again . . . but i have trouble getting rid of the disappointment in myself for messing up. Master does not like this behavior and has talked with me often about continuing to "beating myself up" over mistakes that He has already corrected. Master feels that once correction has been made, the matter is over and should not be dwelled upon further. i have tried but unless the punishment includes corporal, i have found it very difficult. So my question is this . . . how do slaves get rid of that bad feeling without corporal? Thankfully Master is very understanding and He acquiesces to His slaves need for the sake of her mental stability, but this slave would like to be less of a "broken toy" for Master. My Lords clay All that i am and will be is by His generousity. i thank my Master for finding me and helping me find myself. i am His to mold as He sees fit. 22 May 09, 12:58 AM Oysterspearl US(VA), 19 mths MyLordsClay wrote: Need for Punishment? So my question is this . . . how do slaves get rid of that bad feeling without corporal? This is a tough one for me. Like yourself i can let things go easier if Master sends me to the bedroom and brings out the cane and busts my ass for a mistake i've made. To me i feel like puts and end to it. i too beat myself up horribly when he doesn't use corporal punishment. What i have found that works the best for me is as long as i can think it through and find a way for this not to happen again, i feel better. Usually Master helps me work through this. And as always, when Master says to let it go, then let it go. Not doing so is going against his wishes. Good luck to you. pearl 22 May 09, 2:40 PM 976-188-983 US(ID), 2 yrs I too would prefer corporal punishment but I rarely, if ever, get it. I do beat myself up over mistakes that I have made but like pearl I usually think it through to a conclusion that works for me and Master. Master usually helps me with this but sometimes he justs lets me struggle with the dilema so that I learn the lesson better on my own. If I repeat a particularly bad action (which is rare), Master will lecture me for hours on it which is very effective for me since I hate lectures. Like pearl says, think it through to a satisfactory conclusion and then if Master says to drop it, drop it as that is his wish. Hope this helps a little. Baby In his eyes I am lost, In his arms I am found, In his soul I am content. Kore ga Watashi no Goshujin-sama 22 May 09, 4:39 PM Sir_A_Griff CA, 14 mths 976-188-983 wrote: Master will lecture me for hours on it which is very effective for me since I hate lectures. My opinion is that the punishment should fit the crime or error and I think that cornertime (in a different attire including pampers if there was childlike behavior) , lecture, writing longhand an essay or repeated lines and even use as footstool are different avenues that I will take if need be. Sir A Griff 23 May 09, 5:48 AM 281-731-461 US, 2 yrs This slave also had to work through 'beating herself up' after Master had already punished her. Master used almost the exact words about accepting His punishment as enough because it was what He decided to do, who was slave to doubt that it was enough? *looking sheepish* Master told slave that dwelling on the mistake made her distracted and it made her serve Him at less than her best, and didn't He deserve her best? He had already been gracious enough to correct her error, why should He suffer for His generosity? Well, THAT got slaves attention and one of the things she used was repeating a mantra in her head whenever she started thinking those damaging thoughts or writing it a few times and it has really helped her learn and move on. Here is one that slave used. "Master has disciplined slave as He deemed appropriate. she has learned from the mistake and now needs to get back on task. It is pointless and wrong for her to punish herself after Master has already done so." Of course its a little long but perhaps the idea will help since the situations are so similar... Good luck, Keepers 'lil slave 23 May 09, 1:02 PM SeanT70 UK, 7 yrs MyLordsClay wrote: Some slaves say they feel so bad about disappointing their Masters - that that's punishment enough. i too feel awful when i've disappointed Master - but i've discovered that i need to "atone" for my mistake with pain or i will continue to feel bad and get depressed. I mean no disrespect - to either of you, but having said that, if you suggest his punishment isn't enough so in effect you have to punish yourself again anyway, there's a hole in his regime somewhere. His style of mastering you, and correcting you in error should be enough. Final. A lot of the time Master does not feel that the error warrants corporal punishment and will use some other method for correction (standing in the corner, solitary, etc.). These methods help me think about my error, why it happened and how not to do it again . . . but i have trouble getting rid of the disappointment in myself for messing up. That's natural; hindsight for the error, and being disappointed for causing a problem (for anyone) for your master is only natural too, and again, it's down to your master to pick a style of punishment for an error, not you. Master does not like this behavior and has talked with me often about continuing to "beating myself up" over mistakes that He has already corrected. Master feels that once correction has been made, the matter is over and should not be dwelled upon further. i have tried but unless the punishment includes corporal, i have found it very difficult. Your master is right up to the point where your feelings about it comes into the issue; they are obvious hard to switch off, even 'if' you internalise them. So my question is this . . . how do slaves get rid of that bad feeling without corporal? Learn to bite ya lip and get on with it, don't ya? OK, so ya like a spot of corporal here and there - I happen to love it too; I mean hell, ya master's already dealt with it once and you expect him to deal with it again? (not I said you 'expect' him....a bit top-heavy I suspect?) ....Master is very understanding and He acquiesces to His slaves need for the sake of her mental stability........ Perhaps he should give you a ruler and have you smack the back of your own hand a couple of hundred times; it's harder to carry on hitting yourself under someone else's control han it is to take pain from someone else giving it to you freely. The word 'acquiesce' says it all. Perhaps a bit of peace and quiet from a screaming banshee that didn't get her own way is more apt? If I were him, I'd stick with Plan 'A' since he's the M after all. All of my post is written with the utmost respect to you both, and with having been through both sides of what you're talking about. Enjoy your day, Sean. Lovingly Owned by ~Miss Phay~ 24 May 09, 1:42 AM ravenkaldera US(MA), 4 yrs There's also the possibility, which must be considered, that you might be addicted to the catharsis of a beating, and that the corporal punishment has created a mental feedback loop of "disobey - feel guilty - get a catharsis". In which case it's less about atonement and more about getting a fix. And maybe your top doesn't want to be your pusher. I think that another unanswered question is this: Do the punishments actually work for what they're meant for? Once you're punished for something, do you *never do it again*? Or do you keep doing it periodically anyway ... perhaps when you need another "fix"? -Raven Kaldera -If you're in charge, it's all on your head. If it's not all on your head, then you're not really in charge. 24 May 09, 12:20 PM MRmaster00 US(MA), 4 yrs Y! MyLordsClay wrote: Need for Punishment? i have read many posts concerning corporal punishment and how some slaves do not require that anymore. Some slaves say they feel so bad about disappointing their Masters - that that's punishment enough. i too feel awful when i've disappointed Master - but i've discovered that i need to "atone" for my mistake with pain or i will continue to feel bad and get depressed. A lot of the time Master does not feel that the error warrants corporal punishment and will use some other method for correction (standing in the corner, solitary, etc.). These methods help me think about my error, why it happened and how not to do it again . . . but i have trouble getting rid of the disappointment in myself for messing up. Master does not like this behavior and has talked with me often about continuing to "beating myself up" over mistakes that He has already corrected. Master feels that once correction has been made, the matter is over and should not be dwelled upon further. i have tried but unless the punishment includes corporal, i have found it very difficult. So my question is this . . . how do slaves get rid of that bad feeling without corporal? Thankfully Master is very understanding and He acquiesces to His slaves need for the sake of her mental stability, but this slave would like to be less of a "broken toy" for Master. My Lords clay So my question is this . . . how do slaves get rid of that bad feeling without corporal? Although punishment is a key in the M's relationship, and not so much in the D's, there are many positive ways to show your top that you have learned from your "error" and want to atone for the mistake. You could pleasure him, or make an extra effort to please him by meaningful thoughts and self control. Something as simple as his favorite food or drink. My personal belief is corporal is a necessary part of the relationship, not the end all be all, but at least the threat keeps things on a consistent level. MR 25 May 09, 4:26 PM SeanT70 UK, 7 yrs ravenkaldera wrote: ....do you *never do it again*? Or do you keep doing it periodically anyway ... perhaps when you need another "fix"? This I can very strongly relate to; there was one thing I did - one too many times, and I was punished for it. The memory of that punishment still pangs in my mind even thinking about it, writing this. The pang in my back is worse where I was tied up for so long because of what /i did wrong. Never again. Of course there 'are' things I do in the hope that I might get my 'fix' as Raven suggests, and sometimes Phay is only too willing to oblige just for the sake of it, but even then, sometimes I wish I'd either kept my big mouth shut, or behaved myself. Instilling pain to a pain-junkie seems to be a forté of hers, and not to be taken lightly. Sean. Lovingly Owned by ~Miss Phay~ 29 May 09, 3:27 AM 996-150-083 2 yrs Corporal punishment is a necessary part of my slave training. For serious disobedience a severe flogging is received and yes it does stop me from re-offending. A flogging does help me to put the matter to rest and learn and move on in my slave training. Less severe, daily maintenance floggings are also important in keeping me mentally in my place as an owned slave. Spanked Slave 996-150-083 31 May 09, 4:20 PM beautiful_pain US(IN), 15 mths Y! ravenkaldera wrote: There's also the possibility, which must be considered, that you might be addicted to the catharsis of a beating, and that the corporal punishment has created a mental feedback loop of "disobey - feel guilty - get a catharsis". In which case it's less about atonement and more about getting a fix. And maybe your top doesn't want to be your pusher. I think that another unanswered question is this: Do the punishments actually work for what they're meant for? Once you're punished for something, do you *never do it again*? Or do you keep doing it periodically anyway ... perhaps when you need another "fix"? -Raven Kaldera i think this is exactly what i do or have done in the past...i literally CRAVE pain to atone for something...i think it totally has to do with that physical release i find in pain and wanting to have that. Next page