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	TSR : Web boards : M/s D/s O&P : "What are the differences??" 1 2 What are the differences?? (20) This post is on the M/s D/s O&P web board. 21 Feb 09, 8:49 PM SnowdropExplodes UK, 7 yrs Y! I am very much of the school of thought that to be a Master in a BDSM sense is like a master of any other craft. In fact, the first time I ever felt I was truly Master of a slave, I told her that she was my "Masterpiece" (that is, the work that proved that I had earned the status of Master - craftsmen used to have to produce a work of sufficient quality to demonstrate they had all the skills to deserve the status of "master craftsman"). As others have said, one can certainly not be a Master without having had a slave; it would be like claiming to have a university degree without ever having sat an exam or submitted a dissertation or thesis for review (that is, even if you had somehow learned the knowledge, it is unproven and untested). To me this resolves to the idea that a Master/Mistress is someone who has such a close and intimate understanding of hir submissive partner as to be able to anticipate and direct her actions and responses. A Dominant may also be a Master/Mistress in this sense (and may not use the title master at all - after all, people's definitions differ, and people's preferences differ) but not all Dominants are Masters/Mistresses. Equally, there is no reason why all Dominants should aspire to Mastery, because it is only one form of relationship, and not everyone would find it as inspiring. 25 Feb 09, 3:10 PM N_slavu 5 yrs ravenkaldera wrote: A) Dominance is a personal trait. A dominant is a person who has that as an overriding personal trait, and is open about this fact, and prefers to be dominant in whatever relationships they may be in (or would be in if they had any). B) A Master is a dominant who has charge of a slave. I'd say full-time, but perhaps I could bend and say "to the extent where the slave centers their entire life around the Master, and the Master has the ability to make the large life decisions for the slave. It's a definition that requires the necessary other. Like "husband" or "wife" being rather dependent on being married. Try it. "I'm a Master." "Oh? How many slaves do you have at the moment? How many have you had in the past, and for how long? By what authority do you call yourself a Master?" Of course, the sort who calls themselves Masters under those conditions would probably also lie about that too, showing that they are definitely Not. As I think we covered in another thread. -Raven Kaldera I tend to agree with your comments. Dominance is more of an inherent traight. There is generally a personal recognition of the traight. Doesn't make that person a Master at all. In fact a great deal of dominant persoanlities have absolutley no mastery of their own personality. I have always thought that a Master is one who has 'mastered' his dominance, come to understand better than most how to deal with it and with others on a much deeper level. Much like being a jouneyman in a trade, progressing to craftsman etc. I know there are specific wiki defintions; but, I generally see it more as a "knowledge" progression. I'm not sure it's determined by the number of slaves or submissives He/She has had; but, more on the wisdom They have gleaned from experience and observation and the ability to make profound use of that knowledge. Just the way I tend to look at it. A Master knows dominance, but can a Dom, Master? I don't think so. It's a matter of degree I think. 26 Feb 09, 3:56 PM LillyMoon UK, 6 yrs My take is simple and lacks much of the insight of Raven's, which I agree with incidentally. I tend to use the term Dom/me for someone focused on the "play" and physical control side of things. Master/Mistress I use for some one who has gone beyond the purely physical side and moved into emotional and long term control (although physical control etc is not necessarily given up). One of the problems with being a Mistress and finding suitable slaves, as opposed to temporary submissives, is that so many (almost all professional) Dommes use the title Mistress...which can make explaining my take on things interesting at times. 14 Apr 09, 4:06 AM 803-295-624 US(CA), 3 yrs Y! The Difference between a Dominant & a Master Dom is the name for the nature of the person. I am a Dominant Man. This is my core nature and I thrive in a D/ s dynamic. Now Master on the other hand is a title. Like Judge, Officer, Doctor, or Sir, in this case Master represents a role occupied by the Dominant. An example, I am a Dominant, but I practice a Master/slave level of Dominance and submission. And I am slave 'X''s Master. To all others I would be called a Dominant, to that slave; I am 'her' Master. I don't get hung up on titles. I feel it is the years of experience, knowledge, understanding and the of them not the titles that make a person who they are. I am Ray to all, but a Master to my slave's. It is only the one wearing to collar that I am Master over. As people come to know me they may call me Master or Sir out of respect, much like you would call a Judge "Your honor", or a father "Sir". By doing this they are respectfully acknowledging the position this person holds within their sphere of influence. Some people make the distinction that D/s is mental, and is separate and distinct from S/m. A Dominant in this case would be skilled in mental control, while a Master has learned the physical aspects of using erotic sensation, including floggers and whips. As you continue to investigate and learn you will find a number of differing opinions on this and many other subjects. I would not call them incorrect. I would say, this is their understanding and as such respect it. Dirty_littel_mind, Master Of Bi Girls. 22 Apr 09, 11:05 PM Qrystal_KingandQueen CA, 3 yrs Greetings to all. THE difference???...as in core nature in the dynamics of DOM/MASTER...DOM/MISTRESS and slave??. hmmm....it IS simple REALLY. THE TRUEST of DOMINANTS (MASTER/MISTRESS do NOT allow ANY type of 'limits, conditions, criteria, to BE set by the slave AT ALL in ANY aspect of the slave's WHOLE life; NONE whatsoever. THE REAL and TRULY serious D/MASTER or MISTRESS and slave KNOWS this in their soul/hearts and minds FULLY AND LIVE it FULLY (never mind "practicing it) ANY TRUE slave will NOT dare to place or demand ANY conditions onto the MASTER or MISTRESS. THAT is STILL just "playing at it" (AFTER the 2 year initial introductory time period into this "lifestyle"). ANYTHING past the 2 yrs intro time...for either 'D' or 's'...is just games being OVERLY prolonged by cowardly "wannabes" too afraid to live it fully and HARD CORE by 'nature's own set of rules. The "dom"/"domme" is NOT the same as the MASTER or MISTRESS in the FACT that the LATTER is a PURELY "predatory" state of heart and mind (to a safe enough degree). The former is NOT a "predator" type and WILL accept the set conditions of any and ALL so called "slaves" wannabes. From all the profile/adds I/WE have read on EVEN THIS site (which is suppose to BE for the REAL DOMINATION and submission way of life!?!)...NONE so far have ANY TRUE and REAL signs of TRUE and REAL Masters and Mistresses or slaves; from what is being written IN the profiles' "written" part. ALL sound like MAJOR "game players". The staff EVEN here have not taken the TIME and true effort to weed out the " game players" from the TRUE hard core "lifestyle" people; and 'denied those "players" from being part of THIS site. THIS makes it VERY difficult to find ANY TRUEST of slaves EVEN on HERE. So, THAT IS the MAJOR difference along with many other differences between the dominant and the MASTER.MISTRESS. as in the ORIGINAL meaning; having nothing to do with the "sex" or "kink" factor directly in any way. It IS about CONTROL and DOMINATION in EVERY aspect of LIFE overall. *** OUR HARD CORE belief and way of life and opinion. THE QRYSTAL KING (MASTER) and QUEEN (MISTRESS) of the QRYSTAL KINGDOM/EMPIRE 23 Apr 09, 1:14 AM Masters_Monella 3 yrs *wiggles a finger in her ear* My, you must be very confident to speak so loudly. *giggles* just kidding, I felt this thread was becoming a bit heavy handed and wanted to lighten the tone up a bit, carry on! Master's Monella 23 Apr 09, 2:21 AM JRCs_petk HK, 4 yrs Y! Qrystal_KingandQueen wrote: Greetings to all. THE REAL and TRULY serious D/MASTER or MISTRESS and slave KNOWS this in their soul/hearts and minds FULLY AND LIVE it FULLY (never mind "practicing it) ANY TRUE slave will NOT dare to place or demand ANY conditions onto the MASTER or MISTRESS. THAT is STILL just "playing at it" (AFTER the 2 year initial introductory time period into this "lifestyle"). ANYTHING past the 2 yrs intro time...for either 'D' or 's'...is just games being OVERLY prolonged by cowardly "wannabes" too afraid to live it fully and HARD CORE by 'nature's own set of rules. **Snip From all the profile/adds I/WE have read on EVEN THIS site (which is suppose to BE for the REAL DOMINATION and submission way of life!?!)...NONE so far have ANY TRUE and REAL signs of TRUE and REAL Masters and Mistresses or slaves; from what is being written IN the profiles' "written" part. ALL sound like MAJOR "game players". **Snip *** OUR HARD CORE belief and way of life and opinion. THE QRYSTAL KING (MASTER) and QUEEN (MISTRESS) of the QRYSTAL KINGDOM/EMPIRE The art of the English language is to communicate in an informative and comprehensible manner. Capitalising random words in your post has not endeared the reader to take any heed, nor have any respect for your post. I will be brutally honest, when first reading your post, I took you to be in your late teens/early twenties given your manner of speech. I'm sure I'm not the only one scratching my head at your response Qrystal. I might also point out that you've based your assumptions on a grand total of three days membership, hardly enough time to gauge the nature of SD's population. Like any group of individuals, SD! possesses a broad range of people, with differing levels of understanding, preferences, and lifestyle choices. Would you really have everybody subscribing to the same template? As many of us have tried to explain, time and again, differences between Ms and Ds are simply that, a difference. No lifestyle is better than another, it is simply a case of finding a lifestyle that works for the individuals involved. Edited 23 Apr 09, 2:22 AM by JRCs_petk 23 Apr 09, 4:55 AM Bella_Ragazza US(RI), 6 yrs thank you JRC's Petk for posting that informative information for them, I was about to also say something on that. Now hopefully I will be able to read the posts they right, since I know they must have something good to say. Bella P.s. I am very offended by what JRC's petk quoted form "Qristal king and queen" and what they wrote in the above post. I too do not think that it is fair for them to accuse people of being "wannabes" and "just playing" when they know nothing of the person(s) they are speaking of. I for one am very real in a very real 24/7 M/s live-in relationship with may Master, and so are a lot of other people on these boards. Edited 23 Apr 09, 5:06 AM by Bella_Ragazza 23 Apr 09, 6:49 AM Ms_Valentine UK, 4 yrs Qrystal_KingandQueen wrote: Greetings to all. THE difference???...as in core nature in the dynamics of DOM/MASTER...DOM/MISTRESS and slave??. hmmm....it IS simple REALLY. THE TRUEST of DOMINANTS (MASTER/MISTRESS do NOT allow ANY type of 'limits, conditions, criteria, to BE set by the slave AT ALL in ANY aspect of the slave's WHOLE life; NONE whatsoever. THE REAL and TRULY serious D/MASTER or MISTRESS and slave KNOWS this in their soul/hearts and minds FULLY AND LIVE it FULLY (never mind "practicing it) ANY TRUE slave will NOT dare to place or demand ANY conditions onto the MASTER or MISTRESS. THAT is STILL just "playing at it" (AFTER the 2 year initial introductory time period into this "lifestyle"). ANYTHING past the 2 yrs intro time...for either 'D' or 's'...is just games being OVERLY prolonged by cowardly "wannabes" too afraid to live it fully and HARD CORE by 'nature's own set of rules. The "dom"/"domme" is NOT the same as the MASTER or MISTRESS in the FACT that the LATTER is a PURELY "predatory" state of heart and mind (to a safe enough degree). The former is NOT a "predator" type and WILL accept the set conditions of any and ALL so called "slaves" wannabes. From all the profile/adds I/WE have read on EVEN THIS site (which is suppose to BE for the REAL DOMINATION and submission way of life!?!)...NONE so far have ANY TRUE and REAL signs of TRUE and REAL Masters and Mistresses or slaves; from what is being written IN the profiles' "written" part. ALL sound like MAJOR "game players". The staff EVEN here have not taken the TIME and true effort to weed out the " game players" from the TRUE hard core "lifestyle" people; and 'denied those "players" from being part of THIS site. THIS makes it VERY difficult to find ANY TRUEST of slaves EVEN on HERE. So, THAT IS the MAJOR difference along with many other differences between the dominant and the MASTER.MISTRESS. as in the ORIGINAL meaning; having nothing to do with the "sex" or "kink" factor directly in any way. It IS about CONTROL and DOMINATION in EVERY aspect of LIFE overall. *** OUR HARD CORE belief and way of life and opinion. THE QRYSTAL KING (MASTER) and QUEEN (MISTRESS) of the QRYSTAL KINGDOM/EMPIRE OH, my Goodness, have been away for a few months and return to this....where do I start? Firstly, it really is unnecessary and somewhat rude to pepper an entire response with so many capitalised words. It does not make for easy reading or clear understanding. I, too, am sorry that after only a few days on SD Qrystal_KingandQueen find this site such a monumental waste of time. I generally like this site and have found it an interesting place to be. What is this two year introductory period that Qrystal_KingandQueen talk of? Is this a rule or guideline we have to follow? I am not aware of it. I take exception ( but not really offence as I can't keep a straight face) when I am told that because I do not live the same as the OP's " HARD CORE belief and way of life and opinion" I am a coward, a gameplayer, and probably worse. Maybe I should be shot at dawn as well? Anyway, so who decides what this original definition of Master/Mistress is and why it takes precedence over the accepted WIKI definitions ( or at least a range from ell respected Dictionaries)? This site is a broad church and although we have differences of opinion, we tend not to accept people disparaging our particular way of enacting D/s and M/s relationships. If Qrystal_KingandQueen do not think there are any "TRUE" slaves on here, maybe they should think, that it is the Master/Mistress who creates the slave and so all they have to do is find someone willing and mould them into the perfect slaves they so desire. No one is fully formed as a slave, it is a continual development to improve, just as it is with all of us, sub, Dom, Master or slave. No one can be judged as a failure per se, we are all just growing, developing and learning. Back to the OP, the difference between a Dom and a Master. Simple, they are different terms for what can be essentially the same thing. A Dom can also be a Master and a Master is almost certainly always a Dom as well. Dominance is a characteristic so someone can be a Dom because they have dominant tendencies within them or because it is shorthand for a dominant person. A Master is a title, pure and simple. It is a title either self endowed or bestowed by another, and this other must be a person who is in a relationship with them. Master is not a title which means anything outside of the relationship as they are only Master to their own subs and slaves. A man might be Master Chris to their slave, but to me they are not Master anything. I would not call anyone Master and would not expect anyone to call me Mistress unless they are under my authority. Some try to say it is all about mastery of the art of dominance and submission but that is nonsense as some of the most accomplished people are not Masters. Anyone who is the master (of a skill or art) finds that others let them know that is their title, not themselves. Just words, one defines a character trait, the other defines the relationship you have with another or as if often the case, a relationship you would like to have with another. Edited 23 Apr 09, 6:56 AM by Ms_Valentine 23 Apr 09, 3:31 PM SeanT70 9 yrs Ms_Valentine wrote: Qrystal_KingandQueen wrote: Greetings to all. THE difference???... *** OUR HARD CORE belief and way of life and opinion... is fuelled by what?; and moreover was snipped out of my post for brevity. THE QRYSTAL KING (MASTER) and QUEEN (MISTRESS) of the QRYSTAL KINGDOM/EMPIRE OH, my Goodness, have been away for a few months and return to this....where do I start? Firstly, it really is unnecessary and somewhat rude to pepper an entire response with so many capitalised words. It does not make for easy reading or clear understanding. Firstly, welcome back, Ms_V, it seems you get to return to a whole bunch of inane shouting, (like THIS) instead of someone actually taking the time to learn how to use the [ b ] no spaces [ /b ] (etc) to get things like THIS instead. I, too, am sorry that after only a few days on SD Qrystal_KingandQueen find this site such a monumental waste of time. I generally like this site and have found it an interesting place to be. On that brevity I mentioned, oh well, some things are best shortlived, especially the excess capitals; if it's that bad here you'd not be so inclined to stick around would ya Qrystal King? What is this two year introductory period that Qrystal_KingandQueen talk of? Is this a rule or guideline we have to follow? I am not aware of it. It's one of those things where just because this happens in'my house' I must be right, therefore you do everything wrong; no, not at all; it's different is all. The 2-year period in itself, I find to be complete fallacy because in that time, the rest of us would be working on the core of our M/s and D/s relationships, rather than waiting in 'dry dock'. I take exception ( but not really offence as I can't keep a straight face) when I am told that because I do not live the same as the OP's " HARD CORE belief and way of life and opinion" I am a coward, a gameplayer, and probably worse. Maybe I should be shot at dawn as well? Anyway, so who decides what this original definition of Master/Mistress is and why it takes precedence over the accepted WIKI definitions ( or at least a range from ell respected Dictionaries)? Who decides? He does, Ms_V, he's the king, remember? Gawd! Keep up! *rolls eyes* (pleasant dreams are they QK?) If Qrystal_KingandQueen do not think there are any "TRUE" slaves on here, maybe they should think, that it is the Master/Mistress who creates the slave and so all they have to do is find someone willing and mould them into the perfect slaves they so desire. No one is fully formed as a slave, it is a continual development to improve, just as it is with all of us, sub, Dom, Master or slave. No one can be judged as a failure per se, we are all just growing, developing and learning. That's the point though isn't it? We aren't just growing, developing and learning; we are growing, developing and learning, in a continuing process, that sometimes gets hindered by junk like 'that'. Interesting thread though. Sean. Lovi[/quote]ngly Owned by ~Miss Phay~