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	TSR : Web boards : M/s D/s O&P : "feeling inside of oneself, what are Y/you?" feeling inside of oneself, what are Y/you? (10) This post is on the M/s D/s O&P web board. Wed 9 Jul 08, 5:13 AM MasterTJs_lil1bebe US(IA), 3 yrs can one, become a slave, without being a submissive? bebe says yes, because bebe has never been a submissive, bebe has always been a slave, and has always felt it inside too, even before being owned, always a slave, bebe knows, it is inside of bebe, to bebe, it is inside that one knows, what they are, when they finally let that side out of them, and not on web sites, explaining this lifestyle, but to bebe, all are born with sometype of this lifestyle, in them, where alot will not let it out, or not know what they are feeling, they keep it in the closet, where it is safe. while others let it out of the closet, to explore what they are feeling inside, to find out about the lifestyle, to find out, which one are they, a Dom/Master/Domme/Mistress/S/switch/sub/slave, in the inside, then they come out of their closets. and another thought: are Doms/Masters/Dommes/Mistresses, subs/slaves, before, how do they figure out that they are a Top, and not a bottom. MasterTJ's_lil1bebe 9 Jul 08, 10:09 AM anjuli UK, 4 yrs MasterTJs_lil1bebe wrote: feeling inside of oneself, what are Y/you? can one, become a slave, without being a submissive? bebe says yes, because bebe has never been a submissive, bebe has always been a slave, and has always felt it inside too, even before being owned, always a slave, bebe knows, it is inside of bebe, to bebe, it is inside that one knows, what they are, when they finally let that side out of them, and not on web sites, explaining this lifestyle, but to bebe, all are born with sometype of this lifestyle, in them, where alot will not let it out, or not know what they are feeling, they keep it in the closet, where it is safe. while others let it out of the closet, to explore what they are feeling inside, to find out about the lifestyle, to find out, which one are they, a Dom/Master/Domme/Mistress/S/switch/sub/slave, in the inside, then they come out of their closets. and another thought: are Doms/Masters/Dommes/Mistresses, subs/slaves, before, how do they figure out that they are a Top, and not a bottom. MasterTJ's_lil1bebe bebe, I'm sorry but reading your posts is screwing with both my eyes and my brain!!! I wrote a whole reply here but on reflection, I shall take it to memo because my purpose is to help, not to make you feel bad. anjuli ~~~ “I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman.” - Anais Nin ~~~ 9 Jul 08, 2:29 PM SeanT70 9 yrs anjuli wrote: MasterTJs_lil1bebe wrote: feeling inside of oneself, what are Y/you? can one, become a slave, without being a submissive? bebe says yes, because bebe has never been a submissive, bebe has always been a slave, and has always felt it inside too, even before being owned, always a slave, bebe knows, it is inside of bebe, to bebe, it is inside that one knows, what they are, when they finally let that side out of them, and not on web sites, explaining this lifestyle, but to bebe, all are born with sometype of this lifestyle, in them, where alot will not let it out, or not know what they are feeling, they keep it in the closet, where it is safe. while others let it out of the closet, to explore what they are feeling inside, to find out about the lifestyle, to find out, which one are they, a Dom/Master/Domme/Mistress/S/switch/sub/slave, in the inside, then they come out of their closets. and another thought: are Doms/Masters/Dommes/Mistresses, subs/slaves, before, how do they figure out that they are a Top, and not a bottom. bebe, I'm sorry but reading your posts is screwing with both my eyes and my brain!!! In for a penny, in for a pound... When 1 thinks 1 has 1 ideal, not another 1, inside 1's mind, 1 has to consider 1 thing at a time, doesn't 1; 1 could be 1 way, or 1 could be the other 1, couldn't 1? If 1 were the slave 1 thought 1 didn't think 1 was, then 1 might have more than 1 thing 2 consider, about whether 1 should change 1's role in 1's life in 1's relationship and look at the effects it has on both 1, and 1's partner. Quite plain, don't you think bebe? Not a bad demonstration of how hard posts are to read (sometimes), I don't think - I wasn't ripping you at all; just putting a point across. Now, back to plain, good 'ol English... Now, The question you seem to be asking amongst all 'the pretty flowers', is simple; how do we find out which one we are? When I was 5, I had an operation to correct part of a birth defect; that birth defect had made Me 'the fighter' all through life, but conversely, over the course of time, I'd learnt way too much humility and it simply translated into a lack of self-importance. I was a slave for a long while (- I asked My Girl to dominate Me when we first got together), and I/we switched, My having taken a submissive line through life - a backseat if you like, over-compensating for others, and went out of My way to please people. It just became, I suppose, natural (very falsely so) to do it, when really, My actual personality had gotten shoved that far back, it took this long and the right person to bring it back out, which is why I'm the person, and Master I am now. It took a very long series of events for this to happen, and to be perfectly honest, I'm not actually sure if My Girl hadn't come along if it ever would've; perhaps, it's not something we could speculate on, because we're in the here and now, and this is the way it is. But how 'I' came about was simply digging out the real Me that got buried deep down somewhere over the course of years. For other people, it will be vastly different, or incredibly similar, even if it's to the contrary because they are a sub/slave. Master's l'il one®(her Rights are Mine in reserve) 10 Jul 08, 6:30 AM 238-864-563 US(CA), 4 yrs i knew what i felt inside, even if i didn't have a name for it. i know/see now that i accomodated my nature all through my life. In retrospect i see that i did things as a child that made me feel safe that were the type of thing a slave would do. An example: i never went anywhere without my mother knowing where i was. If i was playing at one friend's house, and we left there to go play with someone else down the street, i called to tell my mother where i was. Just an example, but you get the idea. In any event, i think i knew what made me comfortable and what didn't, but i didn't know it had a name or how to express it. i ended up in a very long term relationship that had D/s elements that were just part of how we related. Only later did i figure this out. At the time, it was just how we were and i was comfortable with it. But then ICE. The internet changed everything. So, how do we know? Maybe we always know. 238-864-563 10 Jul 08, 6:17 PM 679-891-210 US(OH), 4 yrs Bebe, thank you! Even though it was a bit hard reading all of your question. I admit I just went back to the first part to answer this so hopefully I haven't missed anything vital to this post! *blush* So while I will tell anyone who asks that I am NOT a submissive, I am happily learning to be a 24/7 slave/pet to my Owner! What I HAVE been in the past is a bottom...slightly different from a sub as I would be the one to set what would and wouldn't take place and could stop it at any time without remorse. Now it's different as even with the other "M" types Sir loans me out to for a heavy S&M sceane I not longer feel the freedom to stop something just because I may no longer be having fun. I do of course have a safeword to use during these times and a set of standing orders from my Owner and if the "guest" Dom should cross those I am required to stop Him and go to my Owner. As to how/when I knew my inclination...I would say I knew I was a slave when I met Sir and understood He was not. ( I started out as a TOP!) However my fantasies have ALWAYS involved BDSM and usually with me receiving a fair dose of pain during the sex! (Submissive-no, Masochist-yes.....go figure) Obie's pet blossom " Hey, Pop, how do I spell this?" "Look it up in the Dictionary" "Ummm, don't I have to KNOW how to spell it already to look it up in the dictionary???" 11 Jul 08, 6:21 AM masterfiremaam US(WV), 5 yrs In my circle, Top/bottom are physical acts, Dom/sub are mental roles and Master/slave are spirtual roles. They can be intermixed, so it's possible to find a Master who likes to bottom or a slave who is dominant. I know several of each. Master Fire ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Oh Hai! Blessinz of teh Ceiling Cat be apwn yu, srsly. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 11 Jul 08, 5:34 PM MasterTJs_lil1bebe US(IA), 3 yrs anjuli wrote: MasterTJs_lil1bebe wrote: feeling inside of oneself, what are Y/you? can one, become a slave, without being a submissive? bebe says yes, because bebe has never been a submissive, bebe has always been a slave, and has always felt it inside too, even before being owned, always a slave, bebe knows, it is inside of bebe, to bebe, it is inside that one knows, what they are, when they finally let that side out of them, and not on web sites, explaining this lifestyle, but to bebe, all are born with sometype of this lifestyle, in them, where alot will not let it out, or not know what they are feeling, they keep it in the closet, where it is safe. while others let it out of the closet, to explore what they are feeling inside, to find out about the lifestyle, to find out, which one are they, a Dom/Master/Domme/Mistress/S/switch/sub/slave, in the inside, then they come out of their closets. and another thought: are Doms/Masters/Dommes/Mistresses, subs/slaves, before, how do they figure out that they are a Top, and not a bottom. MasterTJ's_lil1bebe bebe, I'm sorry but reading your posts is screwing with both my eyes and my brain!!! I wrote a whole reply here but on reflection, I shall take it to memo because my purpose is to help, not to make you feel bad. anjuli anjuli, bebe sent you a reply back, in memo. MasterTJ's_lil1bebe 11 Jul 08, 5:37 PM MasterTJs_lil1bebe US(IA), 3 yrs masterfiremaam wrote: In my circle, Top/bottom are physical acts, Dom/sub are mental roles and Master/slave are spirtual roles. They can be intermixed, so it's possible to find a Master who likes to bottom or a slave who is dominant. I know several of each. Master Fire greetings LadyFire, thanks for the post back. MasterTJ's_lil1bebe 21 Aug 08, 5:33 PM Kittincuffs UK, 3 yrs Hello everyone, my first post so here goes; I feel i am naturally submissive, i don't think i am a slave, but i have switched into domme with only one person whom i completely trust/respect/love and consider the feeling to be mutual. For me i am still trying to come to some understanding with myself, what i actually am. When i find the right Dom for me i am hoping we can discover what i truly am. I feel submissive, i respond to a Dom in a submissive manner, its as natural as breathing, yet, inside me there is a Domme, and i can not allow my pet to switch on me now, in the beginning i could, but, now he is my sub, yet i am a sub! So in conclusion this post is not much help..... In some confusion Kitt 24 Aug 08, 6:55 PM 662-935-655 5 yrs MasterTJs_lil1bebe wrote: feeling inside of oneself, what are Y/you? can one, become a slave, without being a submissive? bebe says yes, because bebe has never been a submissive, bebe has always been a slave, and has always felt it inside too, even before being owned, always a slave, bebe knows, it is inside of bebe, to bebe, it is inside that one knows, what they are, when they finally let that side out of them, and not on web sites, explaining this lifestyle, but to bebe, all are born with sometype of this lifestyle, in them, where alot will not let it out, or not know what they are feeling, they keep it in the closet, where it is safe. while others let it out of the closet, to explore what they are feeling inside, to find out about the lifestyle, to find out, which one are they, a Dom/Master/Domme/Mistress/S/switch/sub/slave, in the inside, then they come out of their closets. and another thought: are Doms/Masters/Dommes/Mistresses, subs/slaves, before, how do they figure out that they are a Top, and not a bottom. MasterTJ's_lil1bebe you know what i love about you my friend? SOMEONE on here actually posts more convuluted remarks than mine. (GRIN= laughing with you, not at you - perhaps at me, though!) as far as slave not necessarily meaning sub - i haven't quite thought this through, but my immediate reaction on an emotional level is "Yes, that's me!" and that's why i think i could only be slave to my late Master and that this is what He knew about me that made Him make me promise to make it so. As far as everyone being one or the other - i.e. M or s, i don't know if i agree with that at all i had a friend, a Lesbian and what i'd call French Vanilla, kinky but not in a BDSM/RACK or M/s kind of way, and definitely an Alpha Female. Sadly i've lost touch with Her. This lady had an MSW in working with Adult Children of Alcholic or Severely Dysfunctional families, including Incest (non-consensual, childhood) Survivors. She had a way of determining what O/one's sexuality was - Her method was to ask Y/you what Y/your primary sexual/romantic fantasies were - were they with same sex or opposite or a bit of both? By that She said one could come face to facee with what T/their sexual preference was. Now she was talking Gay/Lesbian/Bi - or Straight - in Her kind of counseling. But later it was this exact question that helped me come out of the "Whips-and-chains-closet" to admit that, at least with my late Master, i did want to become openly His slave. i don't know if everyone is secretly M/s - i do tend to note P/people in general tend to be Alpha or beta or whatever, but i think O/one can be an Alpha Male or Female and never express it or want to express it in dominant sexuality. i think there are folks who are actually Vanilla - gay/les/bi or straight. i think that many more are what i call "French vanilla" - maybe into swinging, open marriage, etc. but not as D/s or M/s in any way. However, i must add that Master disagreed with me on this - He also thought that every F/female would eventually have a submissive side if T/they found the right male, something i did not see personally. Yet i am not sure He still continued to believe that once He got out to munches and a (very) few other events and met some Fem-Doms/Mistresses. He was on very good terms with quite a few and respected Them, treating Them as equals both in public events and e-mail. However He never SAID He had changed His mind on this, so i really don't know what He believed at the time of His death; but, i'm pretty sure He believes differently NOW - having a belief in life after death as well as in the Old Ones who are both Male and Female. As well as being a member of the Church He was clergy in which also teaches a Heavenly Mom as well as Pop - although it's quite patriachal and She's in the background, yet it's very vanilla. Same church is homophobic to the max, which is one thing W/we didn't agree with - ot to put it in church jargon, "W/we didn't have a testimony of that homophobic stuff". (grin - LMAO) So i have a feeling that the Old Ones or Heavenly Mom or WHATEVER O/one might call the female aspect of the Higher Power/S, that is if O/one believes at all in anything like this - and it's okay with me if Y/you don't as i spent some time when i didn't, for sure! And i have struggled with questioning That a great deal sincee Master's death. But - to try to end that sentence (GRIN) - i have a feeling that He now knows that there is such a thing as a Fem-Dom. And, as always, i reserve the right to be wrong and hope any disagreement can take place without the F/folks involved - including this one - being disagreeable. i've also recently read somewhere a hypothesis that S/someone has about changes in sexuality and in D/s or M/s status being related to age for S O M E -- and i don't know what to make of THAT at all. As always writing from the U.S. in the 51st state, which most of U/us seem to inhabit - KonFuShun (Confusion) - esp. some days. (LMAO) j/L Papa's owned always: still proudly wearing His Collar and Ring, rest in peace Beloved Master/Husband! "Freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose" Janis Joplin 25 Aug 08, 3:28 PM subbyjenny US(PA), 3 yrs £ Y! Hi bebe, i believe i have always been a slave & submissive my whole life. i have always been more comfortable with someone making decisions for me (i believe my submissive side), and i have always been happier making others happy (my slave side). i think it would be really interesting to delve into psychological reasons why O/one becomes a Master/Mistress/Dom/Domme as opposed to slave/submissive. i wonder if birth order comes into place (being first born, middle, baby etc.). i wonder if situations bring it into place, or is it something innate? i definitely think one can be a submissive w/o being a slave, i think of someone that would want to do things possibly that they may not normally want to do but submit because they either want to strengthen themselves mentally or because they like to push themselves in that manner. A slave, however, gets pleasure from servicing, providing, nurturing... i guess maybe these are my own personal feelings or opinions on this. Yes, i think the two things are different. i thought at first i was just submissive, but my current Master pointed out how i automatically went to wash His feet in the shower, w/o being asked, the fact that i want to cook Him meals that please Him, i like to clean for Him to make Him happy and comfortable in His home. This goes into all aspects beyond domestications as well... Here's a thought, i think maybe a submissive would want to do something for their Dominant that they may not agree with or want to do normally, but do it to push themselves and get enjoyment or pleasure to submit to that either taboo or disagreeable act. Whereas, i think, a slave would get pleasure more from how that act is making the Dominante happy or adding something to that One's life... Could be that i need to do more reading on the two different titles... slave: 150-026-759